The new trend it town that seems to have hit most of my male friends is, whenever one of them meets a woman and shows some form of interest in her, she always does something to push him away. And the deal-breaker seems to be kind of universal - DMF as I like to call it (translation: Do Me a Favor).
“You meet a woman for the first time, exchange phone numbers and next thing, she sends a text message the following day asking for a favor,â€? went my pal James. And the favor isn’t some small amount of cash - $2000 plus. “If I had any interests in pursing the woman any further, this is usually the time when your phone conveniently has no coverage.â€?
Ok. We know there is also that woman you meet on Friday and she wants to move in with you latest Saturday afternoon … kinda like the microwave popcorn – ready for consumption within 45 seconds!!! 
That’s another deal-breaker.
This leaves my question that begs for answers – What are the most common relationship deal–breakers?
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Comment by Morningflower on 28 June 2008:
These vary from person to person and some people can tolerate certain things that happen within the relationship and stay in the relationship. - Some deal breakers are sort of “a given” but at the top of my list would be Physical/Emotional/Mental Abuse - (Rot in hell).
My thoughts?
1. If I keep asking “is it me or is it him: - OUT
2. Near Crazy/Fanatical views on Religion - OUT
3. Bossy - OUT
4. Racist in anyway - OUT
5. Unkept/Messy/Filthy Dirty Person - OUT
6. Loss of friendship, fun, humor - OUT
7. Lack of sex, touching, kissing. I am sorry, but that is a basic necessity to me and if I am going to be with someone who doesn’t want me, I would prefer to be single.
8. Loss of friendship, fun, humor
Darn! I think that’s it.. I think its great to have some deal breakers because falling in love can make us do some stupid things..trust me.. I know :)!
Comment by Morning Flower on 28 June 2008:
*Infidelity I guess is another big one? Especially if there is no accountability for a partner’s actions. - Yes..even this can be “worked” out but the way a person responds to this factors if I vote them off “my Island” or not..
Comment by vrb1955 on 29 June 2008:
Deal Breakers In Dating And Life
You can’t be:
Homeless
Helpless
Useless
I think that about covers it
Comment by hotrod2009 on 29 June 2008:
Another good deal breaker is when you meet someone and they only want to communicate by texting you instead of calling. Or they want to call or text you at midnight or early morning hours. Very disrespectful. Being rude is also another deal breaker.
Comment by kris3663 on 29 June 2008:
If you are dating someone and they continue with their online dating sites…looking for someone else…something better, that is a huge deal breaker for me. If you click and there is a connection, get outta the sites and give us a chance or get off my island.
Comment by kris3663 on 29 June 2008:
If you are dating someone and they continue with their online dating sites,looking for someone else,something better, that is a huge deal breaker for me. If you click and there is a connection, get outta the sites and give us a chance or get off my island.
Comment by Maddlion68 on 29 June 2008:
Being needy too soon
Financialy irresponsible
Not doing what you say you will
Being inconsistent
Bad manners
Poor social skills
Bad personal hygiene
Comment by skyprincess12305 on 29 June 2008:
vrb1955 summed it all up…enough said!
Comment by LovelyLorrie on 30 June 2008:
This I have seen, not OK;
Married, and lies about it!
Cheaters
Lies in general..all deal breakers!
Infact..anyone who lies..anyone not honest about who they are, well, just forget it. Find another site to haunt..K.
Comment by PepsInTown on 1 July 2008:
I suspect I will get headaches but here goes.
The deal breaker appears to be commitment and courage. When younger, men are courageous but unwilling to commit whereas women are willing to commit fairly easily. Over about 35, the tables turn; men seem more eager to commit and women appear to be far more cautious.
As usual there is an exception to the rule: the person who wants to marry you having chatted for 5 minutes on the Internet without even meeting; but these tend mainly to be fraudulent.
Comment by Negrita72 on 3 July 2008:
I’m with you hotrod2009. That texting has got to stop. I figure a man who can only text and not call either has something to hide or prefers to control communication by the “tag you’re it” method. Easier to dip out of a text conversation than it is to actually be in a verbal conversation where you don’t have time to make up lies on the spot. Poor communicators or people who really don’t want to talk to you use text messaging way too much! That’s a red flag for me.
Comment by worthurwhile on 3 July 2008:
Kris3663 - that is a huge one for me and very common especially with online daters.
Comment by blkbeauty31 on 4 July 2008:
I’m with you ladies kris3663 and worthurwhile. I hate cheating and dishonesty of any kind.
Comment by Silverfox4U on 6 July 2008:
Dealbreakers for me would be: Not even a smile much less a sense of humor. Not trying to look her best even if it’s just nice casual dress. I try to look my best with what little I have, why shouldn’t she?
Others would include, too serious, too negative, too demanding of wait-staff and others (HEY! My Mother always said you want to know how your woman will treat you when the “new” wears off, see how she treats waiters and other service workers, ’cause that’s how she eventually will treat you. That’s good enough “country logic” for me! lol)
Finally, if a lady doesn’t start to “warm up” toward me after a few dates, it’s time for me to exit right! There’s others, but those are too hard for me to define in any objective way.
That’s my TWO CENTS Worth (probably worth about HALF that!)
Comment by Saffron on 6 July 2008:
Hmmm…lets see…
1. liers
2. ignorance
3. closed minded
4. has no life & looking for you to COMPLETE them..yikes!
5. sees life as glass 1/2 empty
6. bad manners
7. B.O.
8. stupidity
***these arent in any particular order***
thx, now you can return to your regularly scheduled program..
Comment by cuteblkwm on 7 July 2008:
I am with you Saffron! very well put!
Comment by slius on 12 July 2008:
cheating,insecurity and immaturity
Comment by slius on 12 July 2008:
cheating,insecurity and immaturity.
Comment by 17tigers on 21 July 2008:
Drugs, booze, and the party lifesytle are deal breakers for me. Women who don’t know themselves and cannot communicate in a calm rational manner are people I don’t want to know or know of. Fiesty is not a turn on, it is a headache. What happened to nice and loving women anyways? I don’t want a hybrid man-woman either, major deal breaker.
Comment by vt33 on 21 July 2008:
Deal Breakers 101:
Course objective: Do’s and Don’t of Hooking up
1. Narcist (no need for) 25% of grade
2. Any form of smoking that requires, bongs,or hookahs or “papers” (its called gettin high) 20% of grade
3. Dirty fingernails and sh**ty toenails.(your local nail salons have screens for man pedi’s) 20% of grade
4. Refusal to go to the Doctor and Dentist. 25% of grade
5. Those little curly hairs left in the shower, if I can rinse them out everyone can..thats the wig out
moment. 5% of grade
6. Men who are in denial with ANY ISSUE. 5% of grade
Overall test Scores of 85% and over you broke the deal!
You will need remedial courses next time around!
Uh Tiger, what is a hybrid man-woman? Just need a little clarity on that one..lol
Comment by cutesaved1 on 23 July 2008:
Being a single parent I tend to look at single fathers as potential mates, thinking that as single parents we can relate to each other. I went out with this one guy who had ‘the 17 year old from hell’! And the guy didn’t seem to mind. I hadn’t expected to meet him but ‘daddy’ brought him along on our date…then wanted me to play mommy!
Deal breakers for me are:
1. Liars. Why lie about your appearance? If we plan on meeting on Saturday, you can’t drop 50 lbs. by Friday!
2. Addicts- drugs, alcohol, any kind of addiction.
3. Lives at home with mommy after 25 or 30. Now, if she’s ill that’s understandible. If not, you need to get out on your own baby boy!
4. Bad parenting skills.
5. Complainers.
6. Controlling behavior.
Did I mention that ol’ boy fit into all 6 of the above categories? lol
Comment by RIVERFLOWING on 25 July 2008:
Ok easy all. We all can sit and knit pick bout deal breakers, Hell I can think of 1000. I think the real deal here is your own personality. Not all deal breakers are the same. I think the one that we all have in common is TRUST!!! If there is trust to begin with there should be no other probs. With no trust guess what? You can sit there all day and pick out faults.
When I was 22 i fell hard for this young lady in her late 20’s. I found out she had major issues with heroin. I could of sat there and said deal breaker but i did not. I hung around and gave her my help and support. She got clean in 2 you years. She went back to Brown Law in Rhode Island and now she one of nations top senators.
We broke up after she started back at Brown, but you know by stickin around for her it was a life maker. So it comes down to trust thats the deal or life maker.
peace!!!!
Comment by kenyanito on 25 July 2008:
what a nice topic and yes i tend to agree with all of you..
what about someone who cannot call you after a night well spent and you both know it was great?
To me. thats a deal breaker…Coz before it was calls and smses…
Comment by ur78prince on 27 July 2008:
Kriss said it all. it pays being decent and take things kindly. meeting a woman for the first time and all she is thinking of is your wallet; so sad. That to me IS A DEAL BREAKER.
Ladies be decent and sincere; LOVE WILL COME AT ITS TIME.
Comment by Pia65 on 28 September 2008:
I think that what vrb1955 said it all….Amen sister!
Comment by sexybrowns41 on 15 December 2008:
Let me see -meeting a man for the first time
Can’t pay for the date
Lie about his status
Don’t communicate
not treating me like a Queen
Comment by SnazzyBella on 30 October 2009:
Disrespect in any form or fashion.