Analysis of desire: Don’t Black men and Asian women desire one another?

Posted by James, 20 Jan 12

Generally, Black men and Asian women are by far the two racial groups with the highest number of interracial marriages. And the reason for this (as racist, subjective and stereotypical as it may sound) is that Black men are perceived to be physically attractive by women of different races; and the same goes for Asian women who appeal to men of various race.

Generally, Black men possess some unparalleled masculinity and athletic bodies that all women consider an attractive quality for any man to possess. On the other hand, Asian women have femininity and exotic features which are desired by men of all races. So for the pure reason of physical attractiveness, Black men and Asian women seem to spark more interest from women and men of different races – especially Whites.

Since these two groups are soooo desirable, you’d expect a mutual physical attraction between one another right? But on the contrary, the number of Black men Asian women couples remains small – an indisputably tiny potion of 2% of all interracial marriages of U.S. residents. So does this mean the most desired groups by all races find each other least desirable?

Some analysts think Yes! Apparently, East Asian women for example don’t discriminate against White men (being the reason for the high numbers of Asian women White men relationships) but they do discriminate against Black men. So they show less interest in them. Others say the match between Black men and Asian women is rare because the Asian woman does not fit the Black man’s ideal beautiful woman.

Is the reason behind the desire to be with one another purely based on physical attraction? Is there more behind the discrimination of Asian women against Black men (if the allegations are true that is)?

26 responses to "Analysis of desire: Don’t Black men and Asian women desire one another?"

Leave a reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

  1.   DJD2013 says:
    Posted: 08 Sep 13

    There's not 100 buses lined up filled with Asian women that read "Black Men Or Bust" nor the same for bus loads of black men. I'm hopeful its a mutual attraction of beauty, culture, fun and compatibility. A strong black man with a gentle heart may much prefer a gentle nature Asian woman. He may prefer the loud mouth Asian woman. He may prefer so many things but its what he likes and he likes it in the form of an Asian woman.

    Like or Dislike: or 2 (-2)
    Reply to this comment
  2.   yappa says:
    Posted: 20 Apr 13

    I love all the tip-toeing here around this topic. Like the idea that all groups of women find black men attractive and all groups of men find asian women attractive.. Another way to look at it is...maybe it's that many black men, and many asian women have alot of self-hate, and it is for THIS reason that they date out. As times change, it's becoming more 'permissible' for asian women to date black men. Before, only white men were seen as 'acceptable' for them to date. But now little by little, asian women are allowing themselves to date black men, and so their asian families and firiends have no choice but to accept it. So then the more such couples you see, the less 'shocking' it becomes. As for black men, many of them see asian women as a lesser-offensive light-skinned woman to date. If they date a white woman it's seen as trying to 'step up', and while asian women can also be light-skinned, at least they have that 'ethnic' thing going on...so it's not as bad as dating a 'white woman'. Many black men will specifically seek out lighter skinned women because they have hangups about their own race, and this extends to dating black women. Many asian women are the same way, with serious hangups about being asian. Many will outright REFUSE to date asian men and then offer a litany of excuses ('...oh, I just don't find asian men attractive'...it's just a preference). When you see very clear TRENDS in inter-racial relationships, it's crystal clear that many people are deciding who to date (or who NOT to date) based on race. If this were NOT the case, then we'd see more variety in inter-racial relationships but alas, we do not. It's just the same old tired trends. I also love the comment that 'East Asian women dont discriminate against White men (being the reason for the high numbers of Asian women White men relationships)'. Asian women 'don't discriminate' against white men? I love it! That's putting it mildly. Not only do they not discriminate, they usually THROW themselves at white guys....and nowadays, ANY race of man, so long as he's NOT asian. Every race of man (Except for asian) knows that getting an asian girlfriend is like taking candy from a baby and requires no effort at all. All you have to do is NOT be asian and these women will think you are 'oh so handsome'

    Like or Dislike: or 12 (-8)
    Reply to this comment
  3.   yippee says:
    Posted: 24 Feb 13

    some of what is said is true insofar as...black men tend to be lumped together as 'hypermasculine' (and well-endowed) vs any other races of men. And asian women tend to be lumped together as hyperfeminine vs other races of women. however, you would have to have your head in the sand to also not know that when it comes to black men.....and asian women....these two individual groups tend to have LARGE NUMBERS of individuals who have hangups about their own race. we've all heard of the brothas who never date black women, and then use every excuse in the book...'i'm just not attracted to them...they're too aggressive....they're too fat....i have more in common with white people etc.' You see the same thing with many asian women who never date asian men: 'oh, they are too shy....i grew up in a white neighborhood....it's just a 'preference' I have for black men...I have nothing 'against' asian men'....just prefer black men...I would feel like I was dating my cousin if I dated an asian guy.' blah blah So then you combine that wiht the fact that....black men know that many asian women have a thing for them, and it's like taking candy from a baby. Asian women also know that especially when it comes to certain 'upwardly mobile' black men, they prefer to date NON black women. So it seems pretty understandable why these two groups are getiting together more, even IF much of it is based on stupid racial stereotypes, and often self-hate of their own racial group

    Like or Dislike: or 6 (-3)
    Reply to this comment
    • yippee says:
      Posted: 24 Feb 13

      I probably should also add that....when you see such clear inter-racial dating 'trends' (esp in a place like NYC where I live), it's crystal clear that many such couples are getting together becasue of racial stereotypes. If that were NOT the case, we'd see more variety in the inter-racial couples out there. But no....I see tons of asian women with non-asian men and in fact they are known to 'date out' more than any other group of people. Does anyone also think it's pure coincidence that so many pro-ball players have non-white or otherwise light-skinned wives/girlfirneds? Please. The day I start seeing asian men all over NYC with black women....and fewer black men and asian women 'dating out'.....that's the day I'll know racial stereotypes are truly starting to break down...

      Like or Dislike: or 6 (-3)
      Reply to this comment
      • calityga says:
        Posted: 28 Feb 13

        My dad and a few of my cousins are married to Chinese women and phillipino women. I myself am dating a Korean American woman that I met on this sight, so I have no idea where you are coming from. I see Asian women with black men all the time, as a matter a fact my female cousin is engaged to a Chinese man and I have another cousin that is 1/3 Japanese.

        Like or Dislike: or 5 (-2)
        Reply to this comment
        • Vanz123 says:
          Posted: 26 Mar 13

          I talked with some black guys on the net; I'm very much attracted to them physically, I guess they are good lovers but I think not a good husband

          Like or Dislike: or 4 (-1)
          Reply to this comment
        • yappa says:
          Posted: 20 Apr 13

          what do you mean by 'i'm not sure where you are coming from?' You yourself just proved my point about TRENDS in inter-racial dating. In your one post above you mention yourself, your dad and a few (that means at least 3) of your cousins are married to asian women. So that's 5 BM/AF couples right there. And then you add that you see asian women with black men 'all the time' Why don't we see see more BW/AM couples in the US? And why are so many asian women marrying NON asian men? Why are so many black men with non black women? Asian women and black men 'date out' WAY MORE than any other groups. Why? Because they are simply 'more open minded'? No, because they have SERIOUS hangups about their own races.

          Like or Dislike: or 5 (-4)
          Reply to this comment
  4.   MalcolmFR says:
    Posted: 22 Dec 12

    There are of course many reasons. But asian societies are quite conservative and personal achievement is very much valued. Marrying a white man is considered as a safe option, especially for newcomers to the USA who associate economical success with being white. Moveover, east asians have a culture that does not value dark skinned people and not (only) because of some western influence, hence probably more openness from Southeast AW. Filipina women are, I guess the less to have prejudice against BM as the society in the Philippines is considerably more westernized. I had this anecdote from a french-vietnamese friend: His mom always told him not to play with arabs or blacks but to behave well and consider carefully how white (white french) people behaved. It shocked me but for a person of her generation, she was saying something many other asian parents would tell their children. As for the bad picture of black men in the USA, like it or not, the statistics are not in favour of a positive perception. I can only deplore it but single african-american women outnumber those of other communities. There is a real discomfort with this issue in the american society but it is a fact . Second generation AW are probably marrying more BM than first generation.

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: or 0 ()
    Reply to this comment
  5.   SwavorMayor says:
    Posted: 04 Sep 12

    Its a lot of reason whey asian women and men of african descent don't date personally I can't answer all the uestion because I don't have all the answer I have always been close to asians my korean girlfriend in college my mongolian girlfriend in middle school through even my martial arts instructor I grew up close to asians I lovd their culture so much I became a buddhist for the teachings it helped me find inner peace but I came to see over time that you will not be accepted into an asian family due to the traditionaly standards that are passed down through generation like for example me and my korean home girl fell in loved but even though she was an adult her father was my tae kwon do instrucuctor we had trust understanding and we taught each other a lot when we got ingaged and told her father he looked like he was about to have a heart attack he took her back to korea now this because most asian parents tell their children that most black men are violent promiscuous and untrustworthly among other things they make use seem like we are not responsible like we are died beat fathers because that's the image the media pants of most african american men I can't speek for all of us but I know I'm reliable I'm not a whore I have respect for myself and my neighbor and I know what it means to work for something and I'm very ambitions because I want to be successful most asian believe use to be players or gangster but their are some good ones out their its always a rare breed in every race I have dated a few asians and it always ended being true love and serious but their families came in between us plenty times and family is important and if you want to start a family with someone who family doesn't accept you when you have children they won't accept them either I wouldn't want to bring a child into that so I choose to end the relationship I know their are good asian women who don't judge and can think for their self just like their are good black men out her like me I hang around strong educated brothers everyday who think like wise

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: or 3 ()
    Reply to this comment
  6.   fnance71 says:
    Posted: 19 May 12

    Been there, done that. Don't wanna go back to it again.

    Like or Dislike: or 3 ()
    Reply to this comment
  7.   shydude74 says:
    Posted: 30 Apr 12

    wow,this is an interesting topic,im a black guy who does like asian women,from the past to present i have or have had asian female friends and even lived with some.it was a good experience,ive gotten some compliments from asian females before.in a recent book i bought how to attract asian women,i was happy to find out that some asian women do like black guys.the thing ive heard from some black men and some asian women is this.i start with black men first.some are into asian females,but feel they only like white guys,some asian females have said that black men seem to always be chasing white females.this shows me that both have been curious about the other.there are some black male/asian female couples when it does happen its a nice combo.ive never dated asian women or been with any relationship wise,but would if given the oppurtunity.ironically ive dated and been with every other race.id love to see more black men with asian women though.

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: or 3 ()
    Reply to this comment
  8.   moor99 says:
    Posted: 05 Mar 12

    The Cuban population is predominately of African descent, which is the case for islands in the Carribbean, as well as Brazil. The media however tends to prefer to portray the lighter skinned ones as examples of their culture. So Cuban women do in fact partner with B.males wthin their culture.

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: or 3 ()
    Reply to this comment
  9.   laidback says:
    Posted: 14 Feb 12

    i personally have never seen a bm/aw combination together as partners,nor have i seen a cuban woman with a b/m.maybe its because of the region i live in.

    Like or Dislike: or 4 (-2)
    Reply to this comment
  10.   jenelyn says:
    Posted: 06 Feb 12

    to tgod77 they look at BM like alien when they talk to asian women because usually they seldom see BM and AW. together..

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: or 3 ()
    Reply to this comment
    • tgod77 says:
      Posted: 06 Feb 12

      Hi Jenelyn, I'm a single BM and I see a fair amount of AW and would love to date a AW but if I can't a get a hello,do I result to a dating service? Do you or have dated a BM?

      Like or Dislike: or 4 ()
      Reply to this comment
  11.   Anassah says:
    Posted: 05 Feb 12

    This couple is a beautiful couple. i must be in the wrong part of the world because where is live thats seem to be the new dating scene. Black men and asians women and i swear they really look so good together.

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: or 2 ()
    Reply to this comment
  12.   Rosso87 says:
    Posted: 03 Feb 12

    Bm AW, WM and BM make pretty babies.

    Hot debate. What do you think? or 14 ()
    Reply to this comment
  13.   tgod77 says:
    Posted: 02 Feb 12

    Ms. Rachelle hi, I agree with you to some degree but why is it that when black men or a man will speak to a Asian woman they look at us as if we are aliens. You say that Asian woman like black guys so where are they I really would like to know?

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: or 6 ()
    Reply to this comment
  14.   MS.Rachelle says:
    Posted: 01 Feb 12

    Most men don't make good husbands. But that's mostly because most women don't make good wives. Men and women need different things. And compromise is the only way to make relationships work. All the Asian girls I know like Black men as much as I do. It's not as cut and dry as people make it. The heart is much more powerful than people realize. People cannot help who they love and attracted to, just like they can't control whom they are not attracted to. Racism is silly and need not be a part of our world. It's a made up issue that has no merit. People are who they are and not what they look like. Everything else is ignorance.

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: or 7 ()
    Reply to this comment
  15.   cajango says:
    Posted: 30 Jan 12

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

    Poorly-rated. Like or Dislike: or 17 (-15)
    Reply to this comment
  16.   caliguy85 says:
    Posted: 28 Jan 12

    My grandmother is Chinese my grandfather is black from the south. How they hooked up still baffled me lol but I will say the perception of a black man in this country is everything but positive. Unfortunately there idea of a black man is what they see on mtv and bet which is really sad. I've heard some Asian women say black men are attractive but dnt make good husbands which is something I'm pretty sure they were told growing up.

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: or 4 ()
    Reply to this comment
    • nika23 says:
      Posted: 06 Feb 12

      My grandfather is Chinese and my grandmother is black, so I know Asian and black relationships happen. I'm from the Caribbean and it was very commonplace to see BWAM relationships, but in the US it seems the opposite is true here. Actually what you mentioned about your grandparents does not surprise me. My understanding is that many years ago in the US everyone who was not white was considered black (or less than etc.) and white people did not mix with them and minorities intermixed (with black people) more than they do now. After some time, there seemed to be targeted campaign to depict Asians as positive and blacks as negative. This image made white people more likely to date Asians and if you don't know any black people, Asians would be more willing to date whites than the blacks who are depicted negatively. Asians are considered the model minority and the stereotypes about them are that they're smart and hard working, etc etc. while black people are seen as uneducated and criminals. I think the main reason other races don't date black people is because of the negative perception of black people, but people are mixing in schools etc and younger people are more open minded, so I'm sure Asian and black relationships will be more commonplace in time to come.

      Well-loved. Like or Dislike: or 1 ()
      Reply to this comment
  17.   water55 says:
    Posted: 27 Jan 12

    Asians for the most part are predjudice. They are taught to be that at an early age. I knw a few families like this. They told me i wasnt black because im in the same economic range they were, and continued to show their racisim about blk men. I looked at them like they were crazy. The last thing they want is their daughters to be defiled by the blk man, its crazy.....ask somebody if u dont beleave me...

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: or 10 ()
    Reply to this comment
  18.   appetizer says:
    Posted: 25 Jan 12

    Marrying a white male is more favorable for AW since it's viewed an upgrade. It is true that they discriminate against black males because of perception - real or imagined. Of course AW aren't individuals who - generally has the wherewithal to take a stand. If they've been condition to stay away from a BM then it's unlikely they'll go against the grain. Surprising? No. I'm deviating a little, nonetheless, these are invdividuals who often support their own and is more interested in 'pulling' (hey..just keep supporting the chinese etc. stores and all's well) from a system than contributing. In the end, we're all a day closer to our graves. Let them discriminate

    Hot debate. What do you think? or 9 ()
    Reply to this comment
  19.   NOPLAYER says:
    Posted: 21 Jan 12

    I agree, most of us like'em "swollen around the colon" (LMAO)! Asian women run just too small for my preferecne. Ive traveled a lot as a prior service member and now as US Army Contractor and I dont see too many women from China, Japan or Korea with BM but I see more Philippinas, Thai, Malayan and Indonesian women with BM. From what I've seen I find the last group of women I mentioned more open and receptive of BM. Ive seen more of my contracting friends marry Malayan and Philippinas then any other group of Asian women.

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: or 4 ()
    Reply to this comment
  20.   Reese says:
    Posted: 20 Jan 12

    Asian and black couples are rare. The bw/am are an even a smaller group. Who knows maybe it is preference on both parts, but I also think it isn't as acceptable for them to have black husband or want black kids. I also think bm like curvy women.

    Well-loved. Like or Dislike: or 4 ()
    Reply to this comment

Your perfect partner could be online right now

Coaching Testimonial

"The Coaching Service served as an incredible perk and has really enhanced my online dating experience"

Submitted by: Karen, USA, 34

My Dating Coach really took the time to go through my profile thoroughly. First she viewed my pictures and gave me great feedback.

She read through the written portion of my profile, line by line, and gave direct feedback on how to add my personality to it.

My amazing consultant, even asked how my contacts where going and offered a few suggestions to increase my interactions with new men.

I took her advice and made the suggested adjustments.

I have received more contact from men, more views, and have started communicating with more people which was the whole point of joining the site in the first place.

The Coaching Service served as an incredible perk and has really enhanced my online dating experience. Thanks!

Find out more