Do you feel awkward about your interracial relationship?

Posted by Ria, 20 Jul 10

AwkwardWhen looking at interracial dating and which ethnic group is for or against it in general, we always bring in the gender aspect to it and the interracial combination of the interracial couples – say black men are for black men white women relationships; Asian women prefer Asian women-whit e men relationships…

The other day on the internet, I came across the headline: “Most girls like interracial dating buy why do they feel awkward about it?” This somehow made me analyze my interracial relationships. I must admit, when I am around particular people, especially those friends of mine who have clearly voiced their negative views, I get uneasy and pray they don’t rudely show their negativity towards my honey.

One way or the other, I believe most people have been in situations that made them feel self conscious about their interracial relationships. So I gotta ask, what possessed this person to even think this is a girl thing? Well, if you feel awkward about your relationship, kindly share.

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23 responses to "Do you feel awkward about your interracial relationship?"

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  1.   Chriss89 says:
    Posted: 17 Sep 10

    Nope, I've never felt awkward but the STARES are so damn ANNOYING. Seriously, try going out and enjoying yourself at a movie when a group of people walk by (I'm talking, like, a group of ten or so people) and they all suddenly stop and STARE. THAT can be extremely irritating. Mouths wide open, eyes wide, and STARING. People put too much controversy on interracial dating. Much more than need be. If you are out to dinner with someone of a different race and you can't get over the fact that their skin is darker or lighter than yours...END the date and save them and yourself the time. Date to date, and leave the social constructs where they belong=in the perspectives of narrow-minded individuals.

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  2.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 04 Sep 10

    I never felt uncomfortable about dating outside of my race. If they have any problem with it, I don't care because I go by the personality I like the most and that just happens to be outside of my race so far. If I find someone that is my race that has the personality I want, then I would date them and that only happen once when I was young.

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  3.   jade100 says:
    Posted: 01 Sep 10

    I was really interested to read all the contributions here. I am a white woman, about to have my first date with a black guy (2 days time). Although we will be meeting near where I live, in in an easy going city (Brighton), I have stilll noticed other similar couples receiving funny looks from other people. I may just be paranoid that it's because they are an interracial couple. I just wondered how it felt, to get so much attention in this situation.

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  4.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 30 Aug 10

    I never felt awkward about my interracial dating but then I am a white male so maybe that unfairly gives me an advantage in that kind of situation. But then I don't seem to fit in anywhere so maybe I just was ignorant to what people were saying about my relationships. Fortunately, my family is always supportive since they deal more with minorities than they do with white people as their friends.

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  5.   Scorpio8426 says:
    Posted: 17 Aug 10

    After 5years, I am use to the looks we get, mostly from other Asians, and Blacks.. In the beginning I was self conscious, because people would stare so much.and I understood why, I would to, but it made me all the more aware of the Rare relationship that we are in, I do have to add the brothers had thee most to say,,,,,,, My husband is South Korean and I am a Black women, so you can imagine the curious looks we get. I do think that other people feel more awkward about us, because we are a couple you dont see very often.

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  6.   NOPLAYER says:
    Posted: 05 Aug 10

    @ BrownB09 You're right, friends and family can sometimes yeild undue influence over us but as adults we have to set a boundry and not let others cross it. It's something about crossing the color line that really incites friends and family to turn into "right seat drivers" and I'll tell anybody if you aint prepaired to deal with friends and family you may want to stay away from IR dating. Who knows this dude my have been the one?

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  7.   BrownB09 says:
    Posted: 05 Aug 10

    @NoPlayer I agree with you 100 percent. I was kinda overanalyzing things and jumping to conclusions. Another thing I learned is not to let my friends and family influence my decisions in who and on what terms I should date someone. Surprisingly, I ran into the guy Im speaking of about 3 months ago.... He was really nice and expressed no hard feelings whatsoever. :( He's also getting married next year. Ah well..... we live and learn.

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  8.   NOPLAYER says:
    Posted: 03 Aug 10

    @ BrownB09 You shouldn't have ditched him so fast, most things, people and situations that are not what we're used to can make us feel awkward at first until you get used to the feel of them, like a new pair of shoes, starting a new job or going out on a date for the first time with someone you're really attracted to. When IR dating is new for someone it can make them feel awkward because they're nervous, they want to make a good first impression and they don't want to make a mess of things. Feeling awkward doesn't have to mean, to feel ashamed or embarrassed, maybe in his case it was honestly nothing more than it be his first dating experience with a BW.

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  9.   BrownB09 says:
    Posted: 02 Aug 10

    Right on @ No player:) Ive never felt awkward in any relationship Ive been in. I can say one guy I was dating admitted that he felt awkward as he never dated a black woman before after our second date. Hehehe, now why did he have to go there and mess things up, I didnt want to go out with him after that because it made me feel awkward that he felt awkward, LOL!

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  10.   tina3219 says:
    Posted: 01 Aug 10

    No I do not.

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  11.   ebonycoco says:
    Posted: 01 Aug 10

    I never felt awkward about it. Maybe, because my parents in-stilled in me to see a person by their character and not by the color of their skin!

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  12.   honeybee324 says:
    Posted: 01 Aug 10

    I find that other people are awkward about my relationship, so much so that they manage to relieve me of that silly emotion. People like to project their own shortcomings and insecurities onto others. I let them know they can have it back.

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  13.   spiritual12 says:
    Posted: 30 Jul 10

    I would because I never done it . Thus I probably would. Im open to a IRR. Just havent met anyone who is willing.

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  14.   WHURR says:
    Posted: 30 Jul 10

    Yeah I feel awkward about my interracial relationship.... I have been dating the mother of that 2 year old baby that smokes 2 packs of cigarettes a day. Ever since my step-son has been blasted all over the press and he became a YouTube sensation..... my whole view of interracial relationships has been awkward.

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  15.   salsera77 says:
    Posted: 29 Jul 10

    My experience is if you feel awkward in the relationship then maybe you shouldn't be in it. Either this is not the right particular IR person for you if you feel awkward or Woman/Man-up if this is who YOU really want to be with.

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  16.   lu says:
    Posted: 29 Jul 10

    Funny... 90% view "interracial" relationships as black women and white man or black man and white women. WHY? There is a rainbow out here. Interracial is "dating" outside of your OWN race. White men dating orientals at high numbers since they entered USA by the truck loads, yet, whites and other races don't even blink twice when they see "white" men with them which still is "interracial" no matter how you cut it. Are there double standards? Absolutely. It has become the norm in society for orientals B.K.A the second best thing to being "near white". Right and I just won the mega millions. Confident, secure black women and I decided for me, I will date whomever I choose. Do I REALLY care who doesn't like it? They can...K.M.A. until the cows comes home.

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  17.   Jazzturtles says:
    Posted: 28 Jul 10

    I do not feel awkward in the least. I am usually far too interested in my date to care what the world around me thinks. Additionally, I do no feel awkward about meeting his family. I am who I am; what you see is what you get. Like it or lump it. My motto: 'To thine own self be true.'

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  18.   NOPLAYER says:
    Posted: 26 Jul 10

    I never feel ackward until I come home back to the U.S. because in Germany and most parts of Europe IR dating and marriage is so common but in the US we still have a long way to go. I have to remember where I'm at and just prepare myself for the crazy looks, you know the " no he didn't bring her white ass up in here" or the "she should be ashamed of her self" facial expressions! LMAO It all depends on the city and what part of the country you're in. At first I was always ready for a confrontation with some clown but over the years I've grown to find it funny to see people's reaction and the looks on their faces but it only lets me know that the issue is theirs and not ours. As my grand-mama would say, "Baby, they talked bad about Jesus and he was the beloved of GOD, so don't feel bad!

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  19.   talazia says:
    Posted: 25 Jul 10

    I have always dated outside my own race. I find that it is usally the person I am dating that tends to feel awkward. I personally dont care what others think about who I am with. I am not trying to satisfy them or make them happy.

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  20.   BrownClown says:
    Posted: 24 Jul 10

    I admit that I sometimes feel self-conscious when I am in public with the man I am dating although I am beginning to be more comfortable. It is much easier to be with him in his white neighborhood than to prance around holding hands in my black neighborhood. In contrast, he is pretty much the same all the time but he does seem offended that I am not as comfortable in public as he is. It is easy to say that it's nobody's business who I date but in reality people's looks and stares can have an impact. Still I am determine to stay the course since I love the man that I am with.

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  21.   lena1985 says:
    Posted: 22 Jul 10

    yes i can say I am because Im new to it and never did it before! I havent did it before because I was worried about what people think! I still am but I have to do what makes me happy! I think most white men thus far have been real easy to talk to then black men but I could be wrong down the line! But as of now i can see the difference white men tend to talk about doing things with you to make you smile and not talk so much about doing things that make themselves smike they say some of the nicest comment by far and thats what makes me like white men even more Dont get me wrong black men do the same but the ratio of them is much lower! But yess Im getting better at it still awkward for me tho!

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  22.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 21 Jul 10

    Many people we never knew / Love to bring us into conversation as we walk together . Companionship and Love / Attract Good Peoples interest .

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  23.   theladybarb says:
    Posted: 21 Jul 10

    No, I do not feel awkward in the least about interracial dating. Perhaps it's because I've dated interracially off and on for the past ten or so years. But now,it's just as comfortable to me as anything else that I do. I also live in a city in which you see many interracial couples... Mostly white men with black women. It's so nice to see that now people can date and feel comfortable with whomever they want. I do acknowledge that for some, this might be uncomfortable because of the city that they may live in. No one likes to be stared at as if they are doing something wrong. When I first started dating interracially I was very uncomfortable but I soon learned to focus all of my attention on my date and would ignore the stares. To my surprise, this not only made my relationship stronger but more itense and more enjoyable. To shut out the whole world and focus entirely on that one person has its benefits!

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