Mid-relationship crisis

Posted by Ria, 26 Oct 07

breaking_up.jpgAfter years of being together, Jean’s boyfriend dumped her out of the blue... well not for long... Two weeks later, he was back saying he realized she was THE ONE and wanted to get back together.

Have you heard such a story before? So what happened during those two weeks to make him change his mind?

Was he feeling trapped or was he wondering if the grass was greener on the other (single) side of the fence and thought "Oh! This is the perfect time to take a break and play the field."

Your perfect partner could be online right now...

What are you looking for?

Should Jean give him a second chance?

Tags: relationship problems

Responses to "Mid-relationship crisis"

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  1.   fala says:
    Posted: 31 Oct 07

    Too true Coco!

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  2.   cocokisses says:
    Posted: 30 Oct 07

    It's simple...you don't know what you've got until its gone. Period.

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  3.   hoganfan says:
    Posted: 30 Oct 07

    If Jen matches what I am seeking in my profile, she should give me one chance!

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  4.   fala says:
    Posted: 30 Oct 07

    I agree Alaru. I can't believe she took him back after he found out how good he had it to start with.

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  5.   Alaru says:
    Posted: 30 Oct 07

    I've never experienced this before but have heard its variours forms from some who have. The "we need a break to see if we can survive/if we survive this break we are meant to be togther" tripe. It always sounds like an excuse to play around because things seem to serious.

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  6.   fala says:
    Posted: 29 Oct 07

    LOL@Mossimo you can't get that low!!!!

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  7.   india99 says:
    Posted: 28 Oct 07

    try2beleve. i fell what you are saying, many people on these site are just out to play games. but do not give up you will find your queen. you seem like a really nice guy, all those woman who said they would call and never did , remember what goes around comes back around

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  8.   mossimo says:
    Posted: 28 Oct 07

    True dat Fala!! haha, I thought that myself, but I am laying low these days.

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  9.   fala says:
    Posted: 28 Oct 07

    I think the comments were lengthier than the article.

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  10.   mossimo says:
    Posted: 28 Oct 07

    Great comments everyone. Well worth the read.

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  11.   Fkoi says:
    Posted: 27 Oct 07

    I tend to hold on too long. Too long on the job. Too long with friends. Too long with bands. And too long with sweethearts. I guess that there is an element of fear in all of these, mainly fear of the unknown. You know, the devil ya know is better than the devil ya don't!, sort of thing. I've got to say that this way has not worked out too well for me. It has always seemed to be the case that when the job ran out of time a better one appeared. Letting go of bad friendships has allowed me to focus on the good ones and form new ones. Better musicians are always on the horizon. And while the line between letting go of and working on a relationship can be a fine one, when it's time to go, it is time to go, no matter how much longer I hang on. The last time this came up in a relationship, three of my friends said basically the same thing. Time to say, "Adieu." Being hard headed, I didn't listen. Time proved them right and cost me time and money while making me sadder but wiser (I hope). I can't really know what was up with Jean's boyfriend. He might have been doggin'. He might have been bored. He might have a coupla honeys on the side. It sounds like he was scared and couldn't /wouldn't/didn't know how to tell her about it. Whatever the case, there are issues there and I don't think that a warm embrace and glossing over the "break" is going to me a successful strategy. If she takes him back frank communication is imperative, probably with a neutral someone in the middle. Even so my gut feeling is, "After a couple of years? He wants to take a break? Oh no, no, no!!" Kick that cur to the curb and find one who can give you the love and respect that you deserve.

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  12.   try2beleve says:
    Posted: 27 Oct 07

    Starthai, thank you for your wonderful heartfelt and encouraging comments. you truly are a very very sweet person. i would love to have a woman like you. with you being so sweet and kind and supportive i am surprised that you are not taken already. wow thank you. you just uplifted my spirits and gave me a renewed hope. thank you and God bless you in anything and everything that you do.

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  13.   Starthai says:
    Posted: 27 Oct 07

    Try2beleve I can understand where your coming from, I go through the same thing but at the same time I'm not going to give up on finding a nice white guy I notice that some people are on here for the wrong reasons, I suspect that some of the guys have white wives at home and are on here trying to seek some type of adventure,etc. I feel if it didn't work with that person it is for a reason (he/she is not the one) I'm nice and attractive and smart so I wonder why as well, even some guys I promise to call I don't not because I'm not interested but sometimes I'm just very busy and make promises i shouldn't have. I do keep in mind if it is meant it will happen and good things do take time to conquer. I wouldn't give up if I was you, because I don't plan to, you never know if you don't think about it as much it may come when you least expect it:) As to the post I think people can sometimes get tired of each other only in cases that are not real love (real love never dies) I honestly wouldn't take him back, because sometimes we do need space, but not just totally spliting up with someone we spent a decade with, obviously it is not real love and more so forced love; which is not uncommon now days. Too often we settle for fear of being alone when in actuallity it's better to be alone by yourself and not with someone else; get it? My hopes will stay strong I will wait for true love and this doesn't mean the perfect guy, but someone within my standards and someone who knows true love never dies, this way the person would be intelligent enough to know not to string me along. I wish everyone knew this.

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  14.   krisshan says:
    Posted: 26 Oct 07

    jean should be weary of his reasons for leaving her in the first place. i think her guy left her because he wanted to have sex with someone else instead of cheating on her. if that is so, then maybe they should take a break. for some strange reason, i think this guy is going to pull that stunt again and jean will be scarred.

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  15.   try2beleve says:
    Posted: 26 Oct 07

    i have had no success with interracial dating on or offline and the trend continues here. i would like to think that time away would work. but i have had women on here promise to call back and they never do. and when i go back online on find they are back here looking when they said they would call me at a certain time. i have had many show interest only for me to send a pic and never respond back. i have had many who mutually were interested only to forget i exist. i want to be in a relationship with a black woman but i dont find any on here or anywhere else who are serious about dating a white guy. if u cant call it is kind of embarrassing when u find that same person on here at the time they say they will call. i am not stupid so why not just be upfront. love has no color for me but i always seem to find myself convincing black women that i am serious. i had another experience with a woman here who stopped talking to me cause i didnt have a webcam. i said i would send a picture but after she left in the middle of the conversation i said skip it i dont need this drama. all i want is a relationship. not people who are playing head games or trying to hurt people. interracial love works for some i guess. but for me i have tried for years and on this site and i find myself getting played left and right. i said in my profile serious replies only and i really havent gotten that so people that are into games are just wasting my time, unless they are serious. i have tried but after this experience it makes me want to quit.

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  16.   blkbeauty31 says:
    Posted: 26 Oct 07

    goodmorning ria!!! from what i hear, this is very common whether male or female. people tend to take oneanother for granted after being together for a while. some time apart can remind one of what is appreciated about his or her partner and refresh the relationship. i personally would not want to break up just so that i could learn to appreciate the love in my life. we need to recognize that our feelings fluctuate and not base our committment on something so unpredictable ; ).

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