Sex in the Conservative city

Posted by Ria, 23 Jun 08

The conservative woman is fighting battles on two fronts: The Big Mama’s girl and the modern expectations of who she should be.

The big thing for most girls has been Sex and the City … the premiere of the movie that is. Me and my girls have had many debates ignited after watching the movie. And one of the issues was the sexuality from a conservative woman’s point of view. And you must admit Sex and the City is based on a Western culture.

Question is: Are the women sexy? Well my boyfriend who wants me to stay curvy told me I can diet all I want so long as I don’t lose the hips and bottom. Problem is he is of the view that the more the buxom, the sexier a woman is. And I can’t even fit into the clothes I wore 6 months ago.

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My point is, in Sex and the City, the women are in control of their bodies and sexuality … not their spouses. Take Samantha’s avid interest in all matters sexual. She is constantly on the prowl for the next man to bed and she isn’t sorry about what her interests in bed are.

So how much interest should a woman show? That is what most of us conservative women struggle with, especially those of us who were brought up with the notion that a woman should be modest, keep herself well covered, sit properly and shouldn’t show any interest in sex.

Sex and the City has challenged women greatly on how they present themselves to others, particularly to the husbands. Should women borrow a little from Samantha when sex is concerned? I guess it’s not the doing that matters, it’s the attitude with which we do it with.

12 responses to "Sex in the Conservative city"

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  1.   kenyanito says:
    Posted: 01 Aug 08

    Dada, I tend to agree with you but i know most me fear women who are commanding..if you were brought up in the preservative way, its impossible to come out of that cloak...but yes at times we do admire Samantha's carefree notion

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  2.   kenyanito says:
    Posted: 01 Aug 08

    Dada, I tend to agree with you but i know most many fear women who are commanding..if you were brought up in the preservative way, its impossible to come out of that cloak...but yes at times we do admire Samantha's carefree notion

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  3.   dada says:
    Posted: 01 Jul 08

    Ok lets face it i see most guys dissinn samantha yet to be true to ourselves (or let me speak for myself)many men secretly want there better half to command that kind of confidence in the bedroom. Now dont get me wrong guys not the hoping around part..... the part where she knows what she wants when she wants it and how. That to be honest really tirns me on. I bet am not alone am i?

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  4.   Tug2000 says:
    Posted: 28 Jun 08

    Dear Morningflower, Would very much like to get to know each other through any venue that you might choose.Have picture to send via e-mail or other means. Please respond and let me know your preference.......

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  5. Posted: 28 Jun 08

    @Tug2000 - that's sweet of you to say that!

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  6.   Tug2000 says:
    Posted: 26 Jun 08

    I would love to meet Morning flower. She has a depth of personality that would never be other than totally engaging. Everyday would be a joy to encounter!

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  7. Posted: 26 Jun 08

    I was brought up in an ultra conservative culture. Was meant to save myself for my husband to be - sex education/talk was a huge no-no - Yes..I am one of those that attended "girls only" private catholic schools through college! - Uniforms and all! So for a while there I was confused as to how much "interest in sex" I should show. - Well with Age comes wisdom and I have come into my own..in many ways. My rationale is simple - Just as in "Sex and the City" Sexual self confidence is key in a relationship no matter who you are - think about it! how great is it to know that there is a unique and valuable part of us which we can't wait to unlimitedly and unconditionally offer to someone that we are committed to!! *Key word (for me atleast) *COMMITTED* I have a high confidence in myself as a sexual female; I am not distracted by a judge-mental attitude, inhibitions, neediness, insecurities, anger, long-simmering resentments, emotional wounds, memories of painful humiliations, confusions, jealousies, fears of inadequacy, rejection or failure, distrust, control, conflict, self-doubt, confusion or shame! I would rather direct my sexual urges, energy and activities into my man . Samantha in sex and the city seems to enjoy her life and gets fulfillment from several different encounters and more power to her - but for me, the emotional connection/bond has to be there. Getting older has made me more self-assured, I am relaxed - and its easy to get into a sensuous state which in turn enables me to expressively and intelligently communicate my ideas, emotions, sexual interests and desires to my man, or even what works and what doesn't. You may try to do all "right" things like improve your outer appearance, work on your communication skills, learn a few dating tricks, be romantic, sensitive and spend thousands of dollars on dating sites or speed dating, but if your sexual self confidence is low or not there, the opposite sex / your partner will sense it. So there you have it ladies and gentlemen - I think it's great to have a healthy dose of sexual confidence, I think its okay to love sex and have the ability to please your sexual partner, make love for longer periods of time because you know what? You are in love! You are a couple!! I am sure any husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend would appreciate that! How great is it to be able to express your true erotic yearnings, feelings, desires and impulses with your partner? - Most of the time it tends to draw out the same out of him/her :) - and don't get me started on the benefits of great sex! I am not ashamed to let my sexual aura shine and shine strong - I don't need to constantly aspire to be "sexy",or act "sexy" -I simply refuse to walk around in a 'sexual coma' - I am a sexual being and knowing that I bring a sexual encounter that is likely to be highly valued by my partner is a great feeling! I would hope that all women have a little "Samantha" in them - Not the Bed Hopping! arrghh! NO!!!- Some aspects like having Fun while your'e at it, experiencing things fully, refusing to obsess about rejection or failure, strutting your stuff once in a while, wearing some sexy lingerie before a major presentation for that extra "push"! Lol! the list is endless! Personally.. I am so happy to be a woman! I really am! And whether you love or hate "sex and the city" I think those women brought something to Television that opened doors for others to talk about sex. Oh. and for the record.. I LOVED THE MOVIE!

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  8.   party1 says:
    Posted: 25 Jun 08

    A balance of brains and beauty with experience and charm makes the "socialbutterfly" so appealing.Bein able to work with men and women in a corporate forum and be sexy yet classy and professional is quite a feat.Many have the looks but not the savvy,others have the attitude but not the timing. To win over the entire crowd takes a lady that is aggressive but not pushy,tough but smart enough to compromise when needed.To the woman that aspires to be all that,,it come's naturally its genuine cuz it sure cant be taught!!!!!!

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  9.   Musicman65 says:
    Posted: 24 Jun 08

    I think the irony of the show is that the women themselves are quite pathetic and real to life....I lived in NYC in late 90's and early 2000's when the show was at its height and I would say its pretty realistic and have known a variety of women like them - professional, blue collar, teachers, Dr's, lawyers (they tend to be the most aggressive of the lot) - all races, shapes, sizes,ect....Women today are very confused - do they be aggressive "new age women" or do they stay with social norm "conservative neo-victorian routes"...Its a hard call for both have positive and negative consequences...Woman wanted freedom and they got it..the question is what price is paid for that freedom? In my case I like a more conservative type, just my preference....

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  10.   JIB says:
    Posted: 24 Jun 08

    OK, for all you ladies completely enamored with "Sex and the City" what does it say that what appears to be a majority of men hate the show and wouldn't cross the street for a hundred dollar bill to see the movie? Some of you may say it's because we are frightened by the power these women seem to wield. But the reality of it is most of us guys think Samantha is a dog just like we think that any guy acting that way is a dog. Women, conservative or liberal, need to be themselves just like you want us guys to "keep it real" and not portray ourselves as something we're not. For every guy who wants a "buxom lady" there is a guy who truly believes the " more than a mouthful adage." For every guy that disdains "curvy women there is a guy who is crazy about them. Ladies (and Gents), just be who you are becuase any match based on your acting as someone else is doomed to fail. Ken

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  11.   Lisa says:
    Posted: 24 Jun 08

    For a woman to be Samantha's character in real life, she has to have a lot of CONFIDENCE. So... Samantha's character is not sorry about getting the sex she needs then walking away (smiling, laughing or pissed off), why should she be sorry?

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  12.   ladybugs36 says:
    Posted: 24 Jun 08

    I dont think that make here less than being a woman you are who are .your sexually attitude is in you,honey you have to chose to be free with in yourself its every women that has a glow,as long as you love yourself thats all that matter most woman worry to much about everything to see that they are already enough for that man no matter shape or size or race.sex is just not in the city.its in you but most women dont see it, everything you do has sex in it.just take your time and you will see

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