Something new – Is it really something good?

Posted by Ria, 30 Jan 08

'Something new isn’t necessarily something good'

That is the title of an article I stumbled upon. According to the author, since the release of the film Something New - a film about a black female in an interracial relationship with a white male – blogs have made a great effort encouraging black women to pursue relationships with white men. And the basic argument is that white men are the answer to all black women’s problems … white men can do no wrong. Have blogs really blown this out of proportion as the author feels?

“I find it all rather cringe worthy,᾿ the article goes on. “But in particular, I always wonder whether any of these women ever consider why - in a white supremacist society - would white men choose black women as partners. Why would people who have historically enslaved another people now want to be in relationships with them? Why would men who defiled and denigrated black women now consider marrying them?᾿

Your perfect partner could be online right now...

What are you looking for?

Well I do agree that we live in a color conscious society but does this mean that color does indeed drive interracial relationships?

As per this article, the author argues that some of the world’s worst racists are in interracial relationships. “I strongly suspect that in many cases “interracially-inclined᾿ men feel particularly comfortable in relationships with “out-group᾿ women who have a lower status in society. For some, it may be the need to feel special and important in relation to their low status partner; for others, the driving factor is perhaps very low self-esteem in the sense that they simply do not feel secure in relationships with women of their own status (in white supremacist society)᾿.

Well, personally, I don’t agree with the above analysis of why people are in a relationship with ‘out-group’ women as she puts it. According to the article, black women who rave about white men don’t stop to reflect on the reality of having a white partner. And it goes on …

“Do they ever consider that their partner will in no way appreciate what it means to be black in this society? Do they realize that he will never truly understand all the crap they have to go through. Additionally, the white boyfriend/ husband is very likely to expose his black partner to increased racism (through racist family and friends).᾿

But is it really wrong to actually consider ‘something new’ if what you have had hasn’t yielded any fruits? Is it wrong to actually try ‘something new’ when a white man or a man from any other race for that matter approaches you and you really like him?

So something new may not necessarily be something good but I feel that that decision should entirely be left to the person who is open and bold enough to taste the waters for themselves. And why would someone think that a white man gets involved with a black woman because he can’t handle women of his own status? I believe black women are women of class and status too. And what does status got to do with it anyway?

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Responses to "Something new – Is it really something good?"

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  1. Posted: 21 May 10

    It would be ignorant of anyone to think that inter-racial marriages do not face challenges. They are real. But what is also real is the love my wife and I have for each other which not only faces but exceedingly overcomes those challenges. My priorities are the LORD God followed by my wife, the two greatest loves of my life. So there is challenge that we cannot face and overcome and that includes bigotry. And if the US and Europe can't handle it, come to the Beautiful island of Trinidad and Tobago here in the Caribbean, we'll certainly welcome you here.

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  2.   Bellara says:
    Posted: 25 Apr 10

    I am so sick and tired of all this race talk..one more blog and i will be forced to gag. Let's focus more on the dating part not the race part. The articles are appreciated but it'll be even more appreciated if most articles focuses on giving dating advice, dating 101 forums, things like that before bringing race into the picture...its getting old and lame

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  3.   Wonka says:
    Posted: 09 Mar 10

    I actually saw this movie like four times,and eachtime I saw it,I thought to myself"Good movie, romantic(which isn't really my thing,but,that's ok) she's beautiful,he's desperate.Last but not least I thought OVERRATED!!.Give me a freakin' break already with all these interracial movies.Hey HOLLYWOOD,I got news for ya,OVERRATED!!. -WONKA HAS SPOKEN!!

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  4.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 05 Mar 10

    Some do / some don't Some will / Some won't Life is to Enjoy Together / Our Choice

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  5.   maymiedoll says:
    Posted: 04 Mar 10

    OH GOSH I MUST comment on this one--though I tried with all my might NOT to. I really need to say "Get over it, already!" Did anyone ever consider the fact that some of us are just attracted to a different race? In today's world it is hard for a female to exist, letalone a white, black, Asian female. If a black woman is attracted to black men that is not necessarily her choice and maybe the world truly IS changing. We aren't afraid to color outside the lines anymore. Be GLAD that fear is dissipating and be with the one you fall for because no matter where you go you will find some idiot schmuk who wants to tear you down. THAT is the type of world we live in. The question is, "Are we going to face each day with a smile, loving every minute of it," or "Are we going to waste our time complaining about something we just cannot change." The question "Why," has been plaguing philosophers for centuries but sometimes it us just best UNANSWERED. If everyone would just let each other be happy we would all live in a perfect world.

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  6.   Tom says:
    Posted: 29 Jan 10

    I am a nice looking white male. Im educated and believe in love, family and community. I am super attracted by black women. And its frustrating for me as I want to ask them out . They are beautiful . They are the sexiset things God has ever made. But Im afraid they will reject me because I am just a 'white boy'. I am hoping there are more black girls join the movement of dating other races so that a guy like can have a fair shot at show you how beautiful you black ladies really are.

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  7.   VA_SongBird says:
    Posted: 14 Feb 09

    I actually enjoyed that movie on LTM Network. I think if we keep the movie in perspective, inter racial dating was "something" new for female character in this role. The male character really didn't have an issue with race. He just saw a beautiful woman he was attracted to. The title of the movie suggested the character was broadening her options since her traditional preferences were not resulting in a meaningful relationship. As we all know, Inter racial dating has been around since the bible days and is very much old. As to whether inter racial dating is something good between a white man and a black woman, I really think it depends soley on the individuals involved and what they are bringing to the relationship. As wel know, each relationship has its own unique set of finger prints. Therefore, you can not automatically assume a change in skin color is going to guarantee a successful relationship.

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  8. Posted: 15 Jan 09

    DOes it rlly matter? Yes, but only when one accepts that that history has occured, then one can move on. Im a 17 yr old black girl who is w/ 18yr old white boy. we have our differences b/c we were raised differently but we balance each other out and we really enjoy bein together which is way more important. we are lucky b/c no one we know rlly cares about our being different or if they have they have not said it to our face. people should only state positive things and get on with their lives and mind their own business

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  9.   cc says:
    Posted: 07 Nov 08

    Iam starting a new relationship with someone who doesn't fit the profiles I read. He asked if I would be uncomfortable with a guy outside my race I told him that he is a guy and just be nice to me. Any relationship is different, with any new people .

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  10. Posted: 14 Jul 08

    why cant it just be two people in love regardless of history.they might not even really identify with.i dont see white irish people in america being all hung up on the great famin or whatever.and i dont see blck women really being bitter about the slavery that happened unless 1 theyr a militant angry type the extrelmly racist blck person who lets that part of histor y dictate how they think or are just plain insecure i know those things happend ,slavery and such but whte guys who are real men dont care about that they are mature enought o know the difference between being like thomas jefferson who had sex with his slaves and a real man who dates for the person.i thinkmature adults know the difference if they are bigots or if they can deal with the world and are in touch with it.plus the media is continuing with it this very website doesnt help get a black girl or meet a white man who is willuing to get with you.can we forget about the drama and just be adults like it should be dont let hate and greed get you down and turn u into a pig.blck women and whte men

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  11.   ebonedoll says:
    Posted: 11 Jul 08

    I saw the film, and looked at it as just that...a "film". It was pretty good. I think that sometimes we as human beings look towards anything to validate what we do. That is unfortunate. Being a black woman,I have never cared about whether or not other people have acceptance for what I do. I don't care if my mother rolls her eyes when I talk about my relationships anymore than I care if a white woman talks about the reasons why her black man prefers her over a black woman. I grew up in a family where my father and uncles( some who are married to white women) told all of us dark skinned, bodied,black girls, what beauties me and my cousins are. I come from a race of beauty. Why would other races and ethnicities not want to be with us? I don't need a film to tell me that.

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  12.   kimelodi says:
    Posted: 04 Mar 08

    There are wonderful people of all races out there, we only limit ourselves if we close ourselves off by clinging to misconceptions about any one race. People are people.

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  13.   kimelodi says:
    Posted: 04 Mar 08

    Most of us have our misconceptions about one another however small they may be and those misconceptions are commonly driven by ignorance. Things will not change until we open our hearts and broaden our scope of human life, love and interaction. I am a multiracial woman who considers myself to be African American. I've not had success with dating many black men because of various issues such as making more money than many of my African American brothers among other things. I've also been told by black men that they are intimidated because I have had many accomplishments in life. I have also had issues dating white men as well. I would be silly to think that any race is better than another despite our histories. I don't close myself off to just one nationality or race. Why close myself off to someone who could be a potential great partner in life. There is no way that any man or woman would be lowering themselves or settling in any way when they establishes a relationship based on love and mutual respect. This is the case no matter what your status in life. If I had to chose, I'd rather have a great relationship with someone than attempt to gain the approval of society or even my own family where my personal life is concerned. We have a long way to go where acceptance of each other is concerned but I feel that things are progressing, no matter how small the steps may be. We all deserve love and respect, no matter what race, nationality, cultural background or status in life that we may have.

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  14.   Fkoi says:
    Posted: 04 Mar 08

    Wow! This is a really explosive issue. I have never seen so many responses given in such depth. It gave me a lot to think about. And now that I have thought about it, I plan to share some of those thoughts. I in no way would consider trying to downplay the historic devastation of racism, slavery and the Jim Crow laws and de facto effects of those elements that continue to plague this country to this day. There are probably few reading this who need to be convinced of the vile and contemptible nature of those institutions. We have all been the victims of them, obviously Blacks way more than Whites. On the other hand there are few in the United States today who have been either enslaved or enslavers. My own people were too busy being ritualistically wiped out by the Brits in the Old Country and pressed down by the Brits and their henchmen in this country to have much time or energy left over to participate in slavery (although racism is a different matter and in many ways the shame of the Irish here). I was raised without racism modeled to me, no matter how the society at large looked, and have never harbored racist thoughts or feelings myself or understood them in others. Certainly I have never "defiled and denigrated black women" and no one in my family, going back to our arrival in this country, has either. It is ridiculous and racist to blame all Whites for those ugly chapters in the history of this country. It is equally ridiculous, racist AND ignorant to suggest that someone who shares pigment, whether high or low in melanin, with racists are responsible for the acts of racism or that those acts committed by others could prevent the innocent from developing true love for someone who has been, or whose people have been, the victims of racism. Personally I wouldn't want to be with a woman who I perceive as inferior or less than to me. I want my love to uplift me as I uplift her, in every way. Are White men the answer? Of course not. I have known White guys who I wouldn't let hold my pet cobra if it was shedding. Wouldn't want to waste the venom. Maybe it is the nature of a society founded on racism and one where racist laws were in effect until less than a generation ago, that racism will continue to rear its ugly head, in many ways, for years to come. Hopefully we, as a nation, will see an end to it, even if I, as an individual, never will. We each have a responsibility to do our part to move toward that goal. I never thought, until recently that I would live to see a Black man become President.

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  15.   BellePlus says:
    Posted: 23 Feb 08

    I partially agree with the article. Its difficult to be in a relationship outside your own race, but its also difficult to be in a relationship with your own race. When I was a teen I couldnt even imagine kissing a white boy. I was raced with the idea that they rape their own children and step children and that they are not hygienic. Now I am older I know some things are true for the majority of white men, but some arent. Like the fact that they rape their own children. It also happens in the black culture, but nobody talks about it. Its common to hide that kind of things because its embarrassing to the family. That white people are not often hygienic, I personally believe. I love my showers & bath (with something to scrub my body) and I cant imagine brushing my teeth without brushing my tongue too. If a white men takes a shower they just put water and some shower cream over their body and rinse off with water. In my world you are not clean. If I would scratch your back all the dirt of your body will be under my nails. I find it really disgusting. And put on some lotion on your body after each shower/bath. It makes your skin softer en nicer to touch. It also reduces the rachis on your backs. What about the tongue, even dentist are now saying you should also brush your tongue, there are a lot of germs on it. Another point is why white men let woman pay. Arent you embarrassed? Dont get me wrong, I dont need a men to pay my bills and stuff, but If he is a gentlemen and he is courting me to have a possible relationship with him, he should invest in me. Because Im worth it. If he has me, it will be 50-50. Maybe this point is only for the men in Europe... Also communication and values are sometimes a problem in interracial relationship. If a friend of my comes over and you promised to bring her home, dont say in front of her you are tied and you are going to bed. Its rude and unconsidered. I know its not easy to be with a black woman too (for white men). We do spend a lot of money on our hair (because we dont have hair like yours, after all its a white world and we dont want to walk around with our nappy hair), personal care and stuff. And usually we are dominant in a relationship. As for dating a black man, its also difficult, because most of them cant stay faithful (this goes also for some white men, especially the ones whom have black friends) or have kids all over or are not ambitious (yeah I know you have to work harder than a white men, but keep trying, one day you will get there). These things are important to me, so prefer to date a white men regardless all the irritation I mentioned earlier. I know I can change a white men a little bit and I can deal with it, but I cant deal with the fact that my partner is unfaithful. To conclude, interracial relationship is only possible if we both work at it and try to meet each other a half way.

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  16.   BellePlus says:
    Posted: 23 Feb 08

    I partially agree with the article. Its difficult to be in a relationship outside your own race, but its also difficult to be in a relationship with your own race. When I was a teen I couldnt even imagine kissing a white boy. I was raised with the idea that they rape their own children and step children and that they are not hygienic. Now I am older I know some things are true for the majority of white men, but some arent. Like the fact that they rape their own children. It also happens in the black culture, but nobody talks about it. Its common to hide that kind of things because its embarrassing to the family. That white people are not often hygienic, I personally believe. I love my showers & bath (with something to scrub my body) and I cant imagine brushing my teeth without brushing my tongue too. If a white men takes a shower they just put water and some shower cream over their body and rinse off with water. In my world you are not clean. If I would scratch your back all the dirt of your body will be under my nails. I find it really disgusting. And put on some lotion on your body after each shower/bath. It makes your skin softer en nicer to touch. It also reduces the rachis on your backs. What about the tongue, even dentist are now saying you should also brush your tongue, there are a lot of germs on it. Another point is why white men let woman pay. Arent you embarrassed? Dont get me wrong, I dont need a men to pay my bills and stuff, but If he is a gentlemen and he is courting me to have a possible relationship with him, he should invest in me. Because Im worth it. If he has me, it will be 50-50. Maybe this point is only for the men in Europe... Also communication and values are sometimes a problem in interracial relationship. If a friend of my comes over and you promised to bring her home, dont say in front of her you are tied and you are going to bed. Its rude and unconsidered. I know its not easy to be with a black woman too (for white men). We do spend a lot of money on our hair (because we dont have hair like yours, after all its a white world and we dont want to walk around with our nappy hair), personal care and stuff. And usually we are dominant in a relationship. As for dating a black man, its also difficult, because most of them cant stay faithful (this goes also for some white men, especially the ones whom have black friends) or have kids all over or are not ambitious (yeah I know you have to work harder than a white men, but keep trying, one day you will get there). These things are important to me, so prefer to date a white men regardless all the irritation I mentioned earlier. I know I can change a white men a little bit and I can deal with it, but I cant deal with the fact that my partner is unfaithful. To conclude, interracial relationship is only possible if we both work at it and try to meet each other a half way.

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  17. Posted: 23 Feb 08

    I think love attraction is color blind if you are ttracted to someone of another ethnic background it's ok, you are the one that has to "feel" the attraction. And usually if it's real you'll be strong enough to stay together no matter what anyone thinks. Love is stronger and conquers all. One love, --Janna http://www.geocities.com/blacknwhtlove/loveitmixxed.html

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  18.   HereIamBaby says:
    Posted: 18 Feb 08

    There are always going to be issues...what if you married someone who didn't eat meat or someone who was handicapped, blind, crippled or deaf??? Get over it be a couple and don't let people or things come between you. BE STRONG... Southern smiles and world peace, Sharon

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  19.   Sweetest1 says:
    Posted: 16 Feb 08

    VT... I see the liiiiiiiight!!

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  20.   TeeTee1117 says:
    Posted: 16 Feb 08

    Me a black woman who has dated white men aswhile as marring a white man, found that there was always issues of race. I found that some had no respect for black men, I found myself having to defend the black man often and sometimes even the black race as a whole. Their views on us getting over slavery and that everthing was and is now, it their eyes is equal. They dated black women, but would not stand for their little girls to date black boys. Going so far as to tell the little girls you better never date one of those BROS. And they would not stand up for me when it was clear that their family was being rascist toward me. So it more to this black and white dating than the bedroom, your going to have to get out of the bed put your clothes on and deal with life on life's terms. Which is more than a notion!

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  21.   Jeff says:
    Posted: 14 Feb 08

    Something new is rarely better than something old...just the continuing nature of the universe. Nothing really changes, all yin and yang, and it all evens out. Just as every cop is a criminal, and all the sinners, saints...just as head is tails...

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  22.   ethereal99 says:
    Posted: 08 Feb 08

    Something, or more correctly, someone new is always good for a while. It takes commitment from both to sustain the relationship & keep it fresh & interesting.

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  23.   Eva says:
    Posted: 07 Feb 08

    There are no issues. We are very happy. Employers clamour to give him a job. Culture is the issue, not race - society isn't comfortable with it only if she is the afro-wearing kind of black woman, not if she is the corporate type. Then they're just happy for you. Also, previous commenter is right - no such issues in Canada, not to mention France and England. In Europe, black women prefer to date white men.

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  24.   Salsera77 says:
    Posted: 04 Feb 08

    In regards to what VM said: "..... A white man is putting himself @ great risk as well, when he sees no color but his family, friends &/or JOB see diffrent. ....I am sure he knows what possible back lash comes with it, I do not believe white date to be superior over black women." Ok, If that is so then why is it so much easier for white women to date black men. Aren't they (supposedly as outersiders see it) putting their selves at risk too? It's very sad when I go to the gym and see absolutely no interaction between white men and black women but by the same token I see this friendly interaction between white women and black men in the very same place. The former is definitely noticeable. Yes, Girlsixdiva, Canada doesn't have this kinda history and therefore all the bunk that goes with it.

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  25.   Kindspirit says:
    Posted: 04 Feb 08

    Personally ... though I appreciate the beauty of All Kinds of women...my preference still lies with a woman of color ... simple as that! Makes my heart go 'pitter-pat'! Can't it just be that simple, with no underlying 'agenda'? ;o)

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  26.   vt33 says:
    Posted: 03 Feb 08

    See folks this is what I am talking about kathugga, another "BEAUTIFUL MIND" unleashed. Now if I can just hatch my evil plot to get people see the light,and embrace everyone no matter the shade or race it would be a beautiful thing I would be a happy camper..lol

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  27.   kathugga says:
    Posted: 02 Feb 08

    I had problems with my family with my first black girlfriend. despite this, we were together for 3 years. What finally ended things was her baby's daddy didn't want a white guy raising his son. She gave in to that pressure (I didn't help matters by being an ass over the issue). Otherwise, her family was all for us--last I heard, her mom still has my picture hanging up in the house. We've kept in touch off and on through the years. Since then, and several relationships and one failed marriage later, all my family asks is what color is this one. Lol, they still obviously have a problem with it, but it's not what they think in this very personal matter that counts. Point is, every one has their own reasons for forming a relationship outside their own race, and it's a personal thing. I will say that my first girlfriend (mentioned above) was an experiment for both of us. She had never dated a white guy, I had never dated a black woman. I learned a couple things--black families can be more objective and receptive to interacial relationships than white families can, and that I formed a preference for black women at this time. So, for myself, I just don't worry about what others think. As for VT's comments about adoption, didn't you know its the PC thing to do now? forget our own, and go abroad to adopt. While I can't say Brad and Angie started it, they have made it popular--my own stepsister just adopted two kids from Africa. What is saddest about the entire situation is the fact that there are so many children anywhere that need to be adopted. So, pc or not, it is a good thing to do, even tho you (apparantly), myself, and hopefully many others would rather take care of our own first and worry about the rest after they are taken care of.

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  28.   Lars4fun says:
    Posted: 02 Feb 08

    Several thoughts. First, about me: Married to a black woman for eight years and been with women of color for more 15 years now. So my comments are filtered through an interracial lifestyle. If a man is truly a racist, what kind of self-image issues would he have to have to take up with someone of a race they despise? While it is clear to me that racism has been institutionalized in the US, I find it difficult to call it a white supremecist society, as it once was. It seems to me that the vast majority of prejudicial acts are passive reactions, as opposed to intentional acts of disrepect. Bringing up the slavery issue is a little wild. (OK. I assume the author wants to be provocative) I understand that many generations ago, distant relatives of mine immigrated to south Georgia and owned slaves. My more direct ancestors immigrated a couple generations later and wound up in the midwest and did not own slaves. That mean I am "bad" because I have this stain on my family (regardless how far removed it is)? Or am I ok, since my more direct line did NOT own slaves? Is the reliance on slavery more of a cultural situation than a racial situation? And thinking of another cultural situation, it was black africans who owned slaves and sold them to the europeans. So was/is the shame of slavery in fact purely a racial issue as suggested? In short, I think the author went our very far on the limb and used some extreme examples to support their case. I had this movie suggested to me by a woman I just started to date. I thought it was very sweet, watching the transition. And watching the woman's own bias melt away. However, the leading man broke one of my cardinal rules: Never have a black woman get her hair wet and have it be your fault.

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  29.   Delali says:
    Posted: 02 Feb 08

    Does it really have to be so difficult? Why care about what others think about your interracial relationship? Especially those who are insignificant or have no negative or positive impact on your life. The only opinions I value about my relationships are that of my family. PLEASE NOTE : I did not mention friends! Let alone the man in the coffee shop! Goodness!!! Thankfully my family is liberated and just want my happiness. When I tell my mother I've met someone new, her first question is 'Is he a good guy and does he treat you well' NOT 'Is he black or white'. I believe I'm very lucky and blessed when it comes to a broadminded family! About the film 'Something New', I really enjoyed the movie and the lesson I learnt from it is that: If you really and truly love someone, the racial barrier would be broken and it certainly should not even come into the equation. I believe we make things so complicated for ourselves by dwelling heavily on what others think and not what you or your partner think and feel. My favourite famous interracial couple: David Bowie and Iman and more close to home, my own uncle and wife who have been married for 45 years as an interracial couple!!! That goes to show that it works if you don't take into account what everyone else thinks. There should be no RACIAL BARRIERS when it comes to LOVE for it is too much of a strong & powerful emotion. It will certainly break down that barrier...

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  30.   DDan1967 says:
    Posted: 02 Feb 08

    Everyone has addresses everything so well. But you missed this one. " ...men can do no wrong" Lord I wish that were true. Even with the best of intentions you know that we will fall flat on our faces from time to time. Doug

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  31.   fala says:
    Posted: 02 Feb 08

    LoL@Mossimoo - we're silly????

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  32.   mossimo says:
    Posted: 01 Feb 08

    You both silly Fala and coco!!

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  33.   deeann says:
    Posted: 01 Feb 08

    High five @ Rae56.

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  34.   deeann says:
    Posted: 01 Feb 08

    LOL Sharon...If there is going to be a pity party you are going to get in on it. Hmmm, you left out 'age' and maybe "financial issues."

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  35.   cocokisses says:
    Posted: 01 Feb 08

    You go Fala!

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  36.   girlsixdiva says:
    Posted: 01 Feb 08

    I agree with gillian...sometimes I just want to live in another country because I am so sick of the racism here. Right now I don't want to raise any kids in this country (USA) because it's one of the most racist countries out there!

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  37.   girlsixdiva says:
    Posted: 01 Feb 08

    geez why do people make such a big deal out of white men and black women dating but it's A-O.K. for white women to date black men???

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  38.   Rae56 says:
    Posted: 01 Feb 08

    The article is reflective of much of the ignorance that continues to be omnipresent in our society. It also reeks of the authors ignorance as well as bogoted tendencies. The article should be an insult to both white men and black women--- actually, it should be an insult to interracial couples regardless of ethnicity.

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  39.   fala says:
    Posted: 01 Feb 08

    Ladies, stay away from Mossimo. I'll handle him.

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  40.   earat8d says:
    Posted: 31 Jan 08

    Black & White, that is great news! However, I seriously doubt that anyone here really cares about your success, or that of your site. Try spending the time with your mate as you do spamming blogs and you may appear somewhat credible.

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  41.   mossimo says:
    Posted: 31 Jan 08

    Don't try anything new!!! White guys just keep to yourselves and leave the black ladies to me!! haha

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  42.   43andrew says:
    Posted: 31 Jan 08

    I wanted to comment further on other quotes......I would think that contrary to what was written above....a white man would, if anything, feel LESS secure in a relationship with a black woman (or any woman of colour)BECAUSE of all the B.S. from outside the relationship...which would just add more stress...but may chose to be in that relationship anyway...and in regard to "never really understanding...all the crap....what it means to be black in this society"...lets face it, the best a white man CAN do is to TRY to understand, and no, if he's not inclined to do so , you may not want to stay in a relationship with him as you may find this too painful or that it comes between you and being close,if he is successful in trying to understand then maybe this is enough...or maybe it isnt...in any case...he's not GOING to understand FULLY what it is like to be black in this society any more than he is going to understand FULLY what it is like to be a woman in this society...consider that.

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  43.   43andrew says:
    Posted: 31 Jan 08

    Yikes...i find the REVIEW of the aforementioned article quite CRINGEWORTHY itself!!!.....and i quote you "Why would people who historically enslaved.....defiled , denigrated...black women now consider marrying them" ?.....did you really say that???......excuse me but I am not "people" ..... and I have not enslaved(nor barring all illegal activity) defiled or denigrated any black women...nor would I...and to avoid the error of making similar sweeping statements as yourself...I will say that I happen to be attracted to SOME black women just as I am attracted to SOME white women...and for that matter SOME Native American ...and SOME Asian women...and I am on this dating site because i chose to expand my horizons in that regard...and value cultural differences beyond the physical aspect of skin colour ( and yes i do spell colour like a canadian!...shoot me)

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  44.   SnazzyBella says:
    Posted: 30 Jan 08

    Hear! Hear! Sharon. I am tired too. tired of being told i look black but i am white thorough an thorough!. What is that? Is being black a behavior? Is being white a behavior?

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  45.   HereIamBaby says:
    Posted: 30 Jan 08

    Hello WORLD... There are all type of racists out there! Here are some I deal with every day: 1-being a woman 2-being Jewish 3-being a BBW 4-not being blonde and blue eyed [pretty] 5-not being the smartest pebble on the beach 6-dating men of color...and I use the word color because it isn't the nationality that attacts me it is all of the beaurtiful colors of brown and black that I am attracted to. 7-being handicaped NOW...if you think that I care about what any of "them" [people other then my self and my mate] think...then you are sadly/badly mistaken. I live my life for me...I can only speak for me and I don't give a rats big hairy butt what "they" think. Anyone in a differnt relationship, such as an intercultural, knows what it is like out there in the world... Since we all came from the same two people......they are all family and you can't choose your family now can you...but you can your mate! I say...I AM TIRED of hearing about it...get on with your life...no one likes a whinner or a complainer! There are stupid people everywhere...ignore them, carry yourself with dignity and enjoy life...grab what you want, this is not a dress rehersal! When someone is Supremist in any shape of the word, I know it is because they feel inferior to start off with...for what ever reason. And if I hear it I ususally tell them that I am black or polish or what ever nationality they are dishing...I love it when they say to me...well you don't look black to me...and I tell them "that is funny, you didnt look that stupid to me either"...or I tell them that my Mother is black and that I don't a preciate their racist comments...you never know who you are talking to so why don't you keep your racist comments to you self...I could go on and on...but if you don't face them...they will continue to be ignorant. Well...enough of this/a rant for now... Southern smiles and world peace, Sharon

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  46.   Salsera77 says:
    Posted: 30 Jan 08

    Yes I also appreciate your comments above, Vt!!! Interview with the Producer of Something New? Click below http://video.msn.com/video.aspx?mkt=en-US&brand=msnbc&vid=b679062f-6e5f-4c96-beef-d618daca0591 Gabriele Union with Daniel on Ugly Betty? Click below: A Thousand Words by Friday 1/25/08 http://dynamic.abc.go.com/streaming/landing

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  47.   Dimpz says:
    Posted: 30 Jan 08

    :-) always appreciates the comments that vt leaves.

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  48.   Salsera77 says:
    Posted: 30 Jan 08

    Oh wow!!!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oCiUlegJmbk&feature=related http://img224.imageshack.us/img224/6044/somethingnewtasterd3.gif http://www.vidilife.com/video_play_416663_Oprah_Winfrey_profiles_interracial_couples.htm

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  49.   Salsera77 says:
    Posted: 30 Jan 08

    Apparently many people think it's something good because they make so many movies about it. http://www.jeffntina.com/ELIG-movies/

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  50.   vt33 says:
    Posted: 30 Jan 08

    hmm.. Lets see now, I think the writers first paragraph, isn't a completed thought. The writer questions why a group of people want to be with another who has enslaved yadda yadda yadda. Well how come some Jews date and marry Germans, American Indians, date and marry Whites, Vietnamese,date and marry White, Japanese date and marry White. Each ethnic group presented has been enslaved, killed, bombed, or some other act by whites. Yet know one questions their choice of partners. A White Supremacist society hasn't existed for quite sometime. Perhaps 7 of the US states still has "White Supremacy" plus it is now called white power, they lost some of the momentum during the 70's and 80's. In my own mind I do think some white men are "playing with black women". They watch television get this ideal of that is they way they are, go to the ghetto coochie bars and "have a experience". Sure people can go and find a million reason to say, white men have always been attracted to black women..blah..blah..blah. I don't think it is all impossible for two people of different cultures can come together and from a lasting relationship. Put aside the world and it's pettiness and it can be conquered. Also food for thought people. Understand the agenda in articles like this. A lot of people don't want to see interracial couples, especially the black woman and white man together. They fear they will procreated and that will produce another independent, liberated mind, who will not tolerate their old views. Same can be said, about, gay unions. Gay folks are open minded, and free thinkers, and have the ability to adopt and or surrogate children. To create another independent, liberated thinking mind, is a blow to the structure that this world was created on. Think people, there is a ever increasing, adoption rate of Oriental children by whites. Here in our own back yard, we have children sitting and waiting for homes, black, latinos, leading. Yet I don't see folks adopting these children. Yet I do see, the gays are adopting alot of children in the US and a lot of them are black and latino children a lot of them are sibling adoptions too. This just goes to show, how racist society are to gays, when they are doing the very thing so called open minded people aren't doing. I don't look up to anyone parading around oriental children and call themselves liberated minds. YOu are afraid of taking risks to break the racist cycle. Somthing New, it is not, this is just a writing to keep black women and white men apart to prevent birth of another "BEAUTIFUL MIND". please no more petty jibberish for those of you who don't agree, it's just a thought and opinion expressed. Ciao!

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