Too much loving kills love?
The phrase run for the hills is usually used when a man needs space … fresh air which guys need desperately to survive in relationships these days. Not my words people. That is just one pal of mine stressing that women must learn the delicate balance between being a girlfriend and being a wife.
According to him, some women get so committed into relationships that they smother it to death. “If lack of commitment is the male flaw, then over-commitment is its female equivalent᾿ he said proudly. Here is all he had to say about the whole shebang:
“Take the politics about food. A woman who can cook is an asset especially because women of this generation are not kitchen savvy. But even so, today’s man isn’t too preoccupied with domesticated females. Much as there is nothing wrong with the cooking, it’s the strings attached to that food that I have a problem with. Miss her dinner and the drama unfolds. She cooks you eat. And when you don’t, then someone else is feeding you. :roll: Translation – you are having an affair. No matter how late you get home or how blotted your stomach is, if you know what’s good for you, better gobble down that dinner – IN MIGHTY CHUNKS!
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Living with a man doesn’t relegate you to play housewife. For Pete’s sakes, why should you be stuck in the kitchen in a world of energy and time saving devices? Cook out of love. Not out of duty. Problem is, once a woman is assured of a man’s commitment, she quickly falls into the wifey role and starts dreaming about that wedding. Should the table clothes match he flowers? Bahamas or Hawaai? She stops being your buddy and transforms into wife-in-waiting.
All this time, this isn’t said verbally. And since you have to be in touch with her feelings, you start noticing the behavior change. She wants to feed you all the time, starts talking you into accompanying her to weddings. Trust me, all this is stifling. For heaven’s sake! All a man wants is a girlfriend. A female friend with benefits. Ria, was I pushing it?
We men have had to learn things the hard way. The moment you become intimate with a woman, rules of the game change. She suddenly wants to fast-forward her life to seeing an engagement ring. What’s the hurry? They never even prepare us for fatherhood. I suppose at this level we are supposed to have locked into their emotional intelligence. One moment you are the boyfriend, and the next you are the baby daddy.
Something very odd happens after this. While before the baby she was committed to being treated as a wife, committed to her domestic role, she now demands to be spoilt and treated as a girlfriend. She wants to hang out more. Tricky number this one because for one she does not look the same so the motivation to hang out with her all the time is greatly diminished, especially when there is a sudden abundance of single women drawn to your new found status.
Such scenarios can be avoided if women were more open about their intentions. There is a clear line between a girlfriend and a wife. Love is for the girlfriend. The wife gets respect, which is why a husband will be back for supper no matter how late. Give us time to be your boyfriend.
Most men know what they want when they get into relationships. Sex, food and silence (translation: peace) On the other hand, women are never sure. So before you spread em for me, think of the consequences. Men are wired to inject sperm and run for the hills. Deal with it!᾿
After listening to the never-ending ‘agonizing’ complaints about women, I only had two words for him. Take a wild guess!
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