Exploring Asian-white interracial romance

Posted by Ria, 13 Jul

Asian RelationshipsWe have heard so much about black-white relationships where interracial dating is concerned. And as a result, other interracial combos have not garnered well-deserved attention. Lately, more and more Asians are dating and marrying whites, however, little research has been documented on the dynamics of these relationships.

In a book 'Racing Romance: Love, Power, and Desire Among Asian American/ White Couples', that looks into Asian-white relationships, author Kumiko Nemoto talks about the challenges and stresses that come as a result of race, class, and gender by incorporating life-history stories and interviews with those currently or previously involved in interracial romance.

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Nemuto shows that the kind of romantic settings and situations couples navigate, depends on the gender of the Asian-origin partner. This means race and gender considerations deeply affect the choices of Asian white couples when they intermarry. And although most couples she interviewed see themselves as colorblind, she thoroughly expresses how racism shapes their descriptions of identity, family and love.

The book shows that just as in black-white dating, stereotypes influence asian-white couples too. The couples have to wrestle with media depiction of Asian women as submissive and hypersexual and that of Asian men as weak laborers or powerful martial artists among others.

Even if we put the ideal of interracial relationships in the same conversations with multiculturalism and color blindness, according to Racing Romance, these relationships are still firmly shaped by reason of patriarchy and gender that are intrinsic to the ideals of family, marriage and our nation as a whole.

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8 responses to "Exploring Asian-white interracial romance"

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  1.   JimShorts says:
    Posted: 20 Sep 10

    I've enjoyed my realtionships with Asian women. They tend to be both intellectually and physically stimulating.

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  2.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 24 Aug 10

    I believe SomeGuy has some good points for why Asian women date white men. But there are things you can do to increase your odds if you want to be one of the white guys who dates Asian girls. Make sure you are on the leaner side if you can and don't be obese. And you have to be at least 6 feet tall or taller because they love taller men. They also hold experience with women in high regard so don't worry about being divorced because it will only look better to them. Also, be as light skinned as possible because they rank each other on lightness which is why Vietnamese and Cantonese are lower on the Asian rating scale because they are darker than other Asians. And some Asians still don't recognize Filipinos as true Asians. So the whiter you are as a white guy, the better. You must at least have a steady job and be goal driven as well and they admire guys that work hard like they do and are light-hearted and don't take things too seriously but like to have fun on their off time. They want someone too that is patient and even tempered that will put up with their shallow impulsive antics when they are on their off time without getting upset at how shallow it really is. They like open-minded people who won't hold them accountable for their immoral behavior when they are having fun and experimenting in life. They also like someone they won't find boring and is adventurous since they get easily bored and are very whimsical. If they can keep themselves busy enough their entire lives, they can then forget the existential void that they have that shows how hollow and meaningless their lives really are and morally bankrupt. Of course they try to cover it up with pseudo-depth like cultural activities where they can pretend they are deep and ease their consciences at least for the moment. And they really love it when you adopt their language because they are fooled into thinking you care when really their language is the most shallow part of their Asian heritage. Also they are heavily into the latest technology especially phones so the more up to date you are on technology that they like, the better chance you have of connecting with them, literally as they are some of the fastest text typers on the planet!! They love texting and a little known fact that it was Asians that got texting and cellphones banned in movie theaters because they would get bored with the movie and start texting or talking on their cell phones and disrupt others who were trying to seriously watch the movies. Notice those signs and ads weren't in movie theaters a few years ago. Well we have them to thank for that. Finally make sure you use a lot of romantic bullcrap on them for they fall for it like a ton of bricks and are more interested in the idea of being in love than actually being in love in a long term and committed relationship. They love to play mind games so romance is one of the games they love to play and in-petulance is one of the games they use to manipulate a hopeless romantic and the more drama the better because they have spent too much time watching Asian soap operas. You think American soap operas are bad? Try a Japanese or Korean soap opera!! They are so bad that they got fun of on Mad TV by one of the funniest comedians of all time who happens to be Korean, Tommy Lee. And make sure you know how to nod and act interested because they are worse than Valley girls as spoofed on Family Guy when it comes to talking about nothing for hours. Of course this has to do with the majority of Asian women that are raised in the United States their whole lives or came here under the age of 30. The more of these factors you have in your favor, the better your chances you will have with the Average Asian American woman. Joseph Moyer

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  3.   serenity33 says:
    Posted: 24 Aug 10

    I would like to take a look at this book's scientific method because it doesn't sound like it follows the strict guidelines of the APA for a Psych study that could be added to the thousands of psychological and sociological studies found in Psych and Soc abstracts which are recognized as valid amongst the Psychological and Sociological community. It sounds like a pop psychology article that isn't for the serious researcher especially when you use to many personal experiences and not enough questionnaires that are anonymous thus helping to eliminate the smelling like a rose syndrome that is such a confounding variable when it comes to real studies. I would like to see the Mean, Medium, and Mode of the study and if it does what a study does and disproves the null hypothesis to the 95 percentile range to be considered a real study. Take a course or many courses in statistics if you don't believe what I am saying. I would like to see things broken down into the type of Asian females we are talking about as far as ethnicity and who they date or marry based on the income of the male, religion of the male and societal attractiveness of the male plus the male's ability to rise in income as far as promotions, to name a few variables. Plus I wold like to hear the confounding variables that they came across that would account for Asian women going after white males that aren't included in the book which any good study states. According to the studies I have read, it does depend on what age the Asian female is removed from her native culture and what Asian subrace she is. Filipinos have the highest rate of marrying white men while Laotians and then Koreans have the lowest rate especially if they are 30 or over when they leave their native culture. Almost any Asian female that is younger than 30 when they leave their own culture and country and comes to the States is likely to go for white guys that are handsome and/or better off financially. Females that are Asian and taken before 30 are less likely to care about religion of the person they date as they adopt quickly the hedonistic and immoral lifestyle of the United States and Western culture. Chinese women are very likely to want to get away and marry someone white because there are still bans on having more than one child in China and they always want male children. I have known countless Chinese women who have been left to die so they can try and have a male child. Many of them that survive sadly show the marks of early starvation by having bent legs caused by lack of vitamin D causing a lack of proper bone growth in the legs as a child known as rickets. They develop and stay that way for life and it is a sad thing to see. So no wonder a Chinese woman would be interested in other races since they are often treated so poorly in China. Japanese businessmen are notorious for their sexual exploitation of Japanese women which younger Japanese women not indoctrinated in the culture might object to. Over all though, the sad part of Asian women being brought to the States under 30 is they lose the good things that are often in traditional Asian societies such as honor, respect, and loyalty and strong moral fiber. And American raised Asian women are some of the worst women in the world to deal with on a moral level as they embrace all the bad American values that are shallow and meaningless. Asian women in America have the highest lesbian rate of any ethnic group. They have the highest rate of materialism and promiscuity of any ethnic group. The ironic thing is that they are very, very smart and career oriented most of the time and they want to keep their marketability so they are the most inclined to have safe sex and have the lowest illegitimate child rate of any ethnic group if you exclude the Filipinos who are known for their many illegitimate children probably due to the Spanish influence when they were conquered by the Spanish so many hundreds of years ago. And since the ones that have come here early or have been raised here tend to be more selfish than their counterparts back home, they are attracted to white men because of the higher earning potential, desire to reduce Asian characteristics somewhat and the media telling them that white men are more physically attractive. If they were back in their own countries, they would be forced to be more submissive when really they crave to be dominant and are very manipulative by their American indoctrination. They know all about the stereotypes about Asian women and use them to their advantage in order to especially sexually manipulate white men and conduct immoral and selfish and hedonistic behaviors that their male Asian counterparts would beat them for. So white men are much more easily manipulated by Asian women and their sexuality than Asian men are so the Asian female is actually in control of the relationship. What occurs is known as the "Figurehead" syndrome. Asian women can appear to be submissive and docile when you first meet them and even when the couple is together, they can appear that way to other people in public. But everyone that is wise to their behavior knows who really wears the pants in the family!! The Asian females are dominant and will use every trick to subtly manipulate the white male using sex, his ego, shame, crying, histrionics, and a huge arsenal of tricks including everyone's all time favorite, withholding of sex in a relationship, even a married one. But they do tend to be the most educated and intelligent of any females in a race and will often build their own careers with no kids while being safely promiscuous at the same time. Having a solid money base of their own keeps white men from being able to always use financial manipulation on them. They tend to settle down later in life as opposed to other races as they have spent their life with the motto of "working hard and playing hard" which equates to being materialistic and being smart in that area while being hedonistic very much so when they feel like playing and white men are the perfect play thing. They are truly crafty individuals that should never be underestimated in the least and are a powerful female force because of their shrewdness. Sadly, most lack morality as they equate that to a religion which they think is a source of male oppression as opposed to a source of guidance and liberation. But if you are looking for a good time with no strings attached, they are definitely the way to go and you don't have to worry about unwanted kids because they are too smart to lower their marketability by allowing that to happen. And aside from the statistics and psychological and sociological studies I have been quoting, I have dated all Asians too as a white male with only one white woman. I have had some good Asian families as friends that were very moral and of high personality quality both men and women and children. When they adopt the good things from their heritage, they are an amazing race of people that should be emulated. But they usually don't have that family support that is healthy and hasn't been corrupted so they too as Asian women raised in the States, end up being corrupted. That is sad but true and I keep looking for women of any race that embrace higher ideals that are more altruistic and morally sound. It is slim pickings but one can still try.;-) A side note, most of the women on this website that aren't white are black with some Latinos thrown in but few Asians. They have their own websites and don't bother with this one very much. Joseph Moyer

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    • eowyn123 says:
      Posted: 24 Sep 12

      Serenity, congratulations! You have posted the most stupid and shallow and narrow minded comments I have ever read from a human being!

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  4. Posted: 24 Aug 10

    I have dated Asian women almost exclusively my entire life. I can assure you their choice in me was not due to educational, cultural or economic reasons. It was based on mutual attraction. The reasons stated by Asian women in their choice for a non-Asian partner have ranged from a lack of available suitors, to social-cultural factors. The Asian tradition encourages the husband's domination in many aspects of marriage. The choice for a Caucasian partner is often perceived to offer a more equal role in the relationship. A successful relationship, no matter what the cultural backgrounds are, include a deep caring and love for one's partner, mutual respect for one another, and a firm basis in friendship.

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  5.   SomeGuy says:
    Posted: 24 Jul 10

    I strongly believe that majority of the Asian populace both in the United States and in the Easter Hemisphere are greatly influenced by the societal standards formulated by the White man, hence them committing actions which can be deemed by most as "just following the hype." Asian females date and marry white males for upward mobility (alongside love and all the other crap that is supposed to be attached to relationships these days).

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  6.   Kanzan says:
    Posted: 19 Jul 10

    I think there are academic, professional and cultural reasons why you see more WM/AF interracial couples. A higher percentage of college educated asian women are working among white men and the cultural standards between whites and asians are more similar. Last, but certainly not least, asians were victims of slavery by white men (at least not here in the USA).

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  7.   Layla32 says:
    Posted: 16 Jul 10

    I am surprised this isn't discussed more, this is the number one interracial pairing in the US. We always focus on black/white, but it is a very small percentage compared to asian-white, especially asian female/white male. The lowest interracial pairing for a white male is black women. I think we need to talk about interracial dating realistically and not try to imply something that isn't true. (Pretending that the highest interest/growth of interracial pairings isn't white males and asian females.)

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