I'm a go getter. I Look like Jason Statham but far cooler. I sleep one hour a day and always dream about life as a stunt man. I love the smell of Germoline but hate puppet shows. I teach eagles how to fly and have perfected the art of leaving the toilet seat up. Doughnut is my favorite food group. Animals love me but fish hate me. I know the exact location of every item in supermarkets I have never been to and against all health and safety advice, demand to sit in the trolley. I never perspire except on Sundays. My strengths outweigh my weaknesses. Basically you won't be able to stop yourself from loving me!

Beyond that:

I'm an easy-going, down-to-earth guy with a quick, dry sense of humour. My music taste is diverse so I'm bound to own songs you like as well as hate! I also love films, days out at the seaside, walking and meals in country pubs. I play/teach the guitar and I write as wel..

I'm straight as an arrow and looking for the same in a gorgeous, down-to-earth, loving and independent woman, Looks aren't everything but they *are* important. If you're an animal lover then you're already halfway there! And las of all, you'll be open-minded as I have a hobby that many find shocking and are too uptight to see the awesomeoness of it. This hobby is totally harmless :)

I'm child-free so please be the same. Also, no text speak.

Should you need another reason to date me - I laugh at my own jokes so you don't have to. But you probably will, because I'm hilarious.;)