Stereotypes and interracial marriage

Posted by Ria, 13 Apr 09

weddo.jpg

There are stereotypes people have formed naturally from observing people for a long period of time … pattern recognition. For example, Asians are stereotyped as small, quiet and academic ... Blacks: loud and violent...

Then there are those that are those fueled by media - like Hollywood, as a form of social engineering. White women are more nurturing … Asian women are submissive … Black women emasculate men. Black d***s … - fill in the blanks. There is always something being said about one race or the other.

Your perfect partner could be online right now...

What are you looking for?

To what extent do you think these racial stereotypes influence people’s dating behaviors? Do you think these stereotypes (especially those pushed by mainstream media) have played a major role in influencing interracial marriages by making them appear more attractive to some people?

63 responses to "Stereotypes and interracial marriage"

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  1.   Wonka says:
    Posted: 05 Mar 10

    You know...stereotyping is not a good thing,but,I see it like this,85% of the time it's true.That's why there called "STEREOTYPES",however,it's NOT right to completely lable EVERY person(who is of an ethnic group that is used to stereotypes)that way. I think us as a people take stereotypes to another level,usually to a negative aspect.I must say their are people who actually do embrace the stereotypes of that specific race/nationality.It can be a bad/ good thing as well,sometimes people automatically think stereotyping has to do with the nagative aspect of the word,but,that's not neccessarily true!!.

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  2.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 07 Sep 09

    p.s. Aunts Uncles Cousins Mothers Fathers Grandmothers Grandfathers Friends and Scenery Pictures of my travels in these United States . All these pictures are viewed Daily and we love the Photographic Skills of My Photography / I am able to do alot more than shoot a Paintgun . Education along with hard work has allowed me to build a 100 foot Deck around Our House already . And soon will Complete this task . With the fresh materials / just obtained have alot of work to do Today , Labor Day [ a time for house work ] . I am Disabled / alas have enough power to move Large Timbers easily because of what I learned moving freight all my life .

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  3.   shotgun007 says:
    Posted: 07 Sep 09

    ....Some of what miri2008 mentioned are my reasons for not visiting these blogs as much anymore. I'm sick of stereotypes. Some of the blogs I don't comment on because they are either poorly written, or just flat out too biased (i.e. depicting white males a certain way or black women this or that)... or lack factual substance. Add to this, rambling posts, argumentative foolishness, and childlike behavior (attacking) has ran rapid on some of these blogs. Stereotypes do nothing but divide humanity and stifle cross cultural relationships.

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  4.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 05 Sep 09

    Glock ; Sorry it took this long to respond , My Awards got moved to one wall when I got married . There are Hundreds of pictures of Our Family on the other walls in this house / We do not live in a small apartment as many others do . I Paid for Cash and Homesteaded this Property in October of 1981 . I also feel that you are correct in your thinking , that if I repeated what I wrote Maybe you would understand after rereading . I am " Proud of my accomplishments in Life ." Because I did believe what they taught me in Government schools . I was bringing this forth because of the derogatory statements that had been brought against me in past Blog Topic comments on April 23 2009 . Yes and President Barack Obama with his Degrees in his Resume / Became the Commander in Chief of the United States of America and I am Proud of him . You Continue to openly show disrespect for his duly Earned position in your written word . I do knot think much of you and your shallow comments about someone , you do knot know . There is a Debater in Decatur , Alabama / You may want to talk with . miri2008 ; Stereotypes are signs of Limited Intelligence believed by those that desire to Believe them . My Wife and I were Successful here at and to follow the Blog topic / We are an Interracial Couple , Who long ago set aside Stereotypes as Fiction in Our thoughts .

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  5.   NOPLAYER says:
    Posted: 05 Sep 09

    Miri2008 - keep in mind that website blogs are where people state their opinions about various topics. While some of the topics get heated and some of the post are hurtful, there's still alot that can be learned. I try to keep in mind, "you cant change years over night." Ethnic stereotypes, hatred and racial poison has infected the American psyche for over 400 years and there's no way that 40 years or less of IR dating well change that. IMO IR dating is a hands on operation and websites only serve to introduce you to a potential date and after careful consideration, then you decide to take it a step further. The blogs are just that, a blog! You take what has substance and leave the trash alone. You can't lose hope over what people post on IR blogs, besides you'd probally never date them in the first place. The people on these blogs don't speak for no one but themselves(myself included) so you cant write off IR dating in America because of a few people on this or other websites, IR dating so much more than these blogs and the people on them! Miri as you know people can be mean and hurtful but you can't let them rob you of what your heart desires, you have to fight for what you want in life and in love, so braid your hair, tape up your fist and get ready to rumble. LOL It's not about the blogs and the people on them, it's about YOU and YOUR determination not to be discouraged by some of the people on them! Hang tough! Peace!

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  6.   Miri2008 says:
    Posted: 04 Sep 09

    These blogs on this website are making me seriously re-evaluate my openess towards cross ethnic dating in America. The mindset of people here is really scaring me. I think the racist poison in the American psyche is just too deep... and I mean Americans of all hues and ethnicities...I lose hope... For people to be thinking and stating that stereotypes are true... wow... I came to this site thinking that it would be an oasis of hope... I find just the opposite...

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  7.   Shotgun007 says:
    Posted: 07 Aug 09

    Another article/blog title, posted to evoke only distractions instead of real dialogue. I wonder if the August 2009 Blog Articles will contain more substance? Not much to comment on....

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  8. Posted: 11 Jul 09

    Uh, way exciting material!

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  9.   Glock says:
    Posted: 27 Jun 09

    Homesteader, Almost 2 months ago, you made the above post to me, I just noticed it today. That is how LITTLE I think about you! I didn't realize I got under your skin that much that you feel it necessary to "prove" yourself to me. On my walls you will find only pictures of my kids. That's it. That is the only thing that matters to me are those kids, MY kids. You won't see the numberous awards and certificates that I have earned over the years in shooting competitions, training classes and the like. Why? because they don't mean that much to me. I tuck them away in a folder and save them in case I need to update my resume. Yes Homesteader, I could care less about your awards or whatever you have in your house. Just the meer fact that you brag about them to me is showing your arrogance and air of superiority. Hell, Barack Obama has degrees from Harvard University and used to teach constitutional law, but I believe I would have no problem debating that very subject with him without so much as an associates degree. Get a life? Get a life?? Again, remember I'm not the married guy who trolls the SINGLES WEBSITES!!!! Talk about GET A LIFE! You got a life and STILL waste it on a SINGLES WEBSITE!!!

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  10.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 31 May 09

    Glock ; to honor your opinion / On our wall are 4 diplomas issued to me from the State of New York and One issued from the State of Texas . Beside them is an Award from the State of New York dated 1965 my junior year in high school when I took a Statewide Regents Mathematics test for juniors and seniors only and The Great State of New York sent me this Award for the Highest Score Achieved in the test . Many Safety Awards for Magnificent Tractor-trailer Driving from former Enployeers , Please take your pistol and tell me of your claim to fame of Awards . Judge another with your superior wit . Spelling was always my worse subject - get a Life .

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  11. Posted: 14 May 09

    wow I would never have guessed that all these issues would actually come up in this forum when the opposite is suppose to happen. People usually fear what they dont understand, but if we limit our interaction to only what we do understand we will as a nation become stagnant, sometimes its good to walk in another shoe before we begin to label and sterotype.

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  12.   LeighRoy says:
    Posted: 12 May 09

    I went on a search today to find like minded people to converse with. I'm shocked at what I'm reading here. Is it normal to find so much antagonism on this blog?

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  13.   Troi says:
    Posted: 11 May 09

    Very interesting how the controllers of the media can always exclude their negativities and mask the evil portrayed on a daily bases. 99% of serial killers, rapists, paedophiles, fraudsters, players, backstabbers, etc portrayed on the media sources are white, and male. This contradicts all negative stereotypes about the black male. Black women are often shown as carers, even to white men and women. Is it therefore natural to assume that stereotypes are deflectors for those that rule the roost? Do Black women who choose to date white men, factor the above stats into their intelligent choices, or is this habit/preference a more negative inference to her psyche?

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  14.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 24 Apr 09

    We are in an interracial marriage which is very Joyfully entertaining , when a man and a woman spend 24/7 together . They ARE on the same computers that they met using - Have plenty of time [ Retirement ] to visit the same sites as they used daily for many years . Why should any change their daily routines , when only a Few complain as to knot understanding how happiness in others lives can Exist / Once the fears of Bigotry of others have been Dismissed as Foolishness of a Terrible History . As a friend of mine in younger years {Alfred E. Neuman } wood say " What Me Worry " and Yes , I shall never forget the amusement of youth which formed my thoughts and Blazed my trails of the Fact that ; All lifes problems are in your own mind , let it go . We as grown Adults realize , that what We sowed in Our early years we will continue to reap the Benefits of in Our Golden years together . If you wish to live in a world of stereotyping others / that will be your world . Ours has changed in a possitive manner through knowledge of what we have endured and ceased to carry in our back pockets [ these things fell out through the holes years ago ] Together We have Patched these holes and see a Marvelously Magnificent Future for Our family . Stereotypes [ the topic ] seem to have disappeared in a few others posts . Take two aspirin and call your Doctor in the morning . Or as Learned at another Blog / Find a Good woman and Togetherness will relieve Headaches , it works for Us . While in town yesterday , we were greeted by all we saw in amiable conversations . In the various market places that we visited . If indeed strangers tend to stereotype Our Partnership , they have sure nuff decided to be friendly in conversation with Us as if we had known each other all our lives . Some problems in life / Only exist if You continue to carry yesterdays Baggage in your own minds . Bronco1968 ; Well stated , people only see what what they wish to see and with knowledge in Happiness of All others - Times have changed on a positive note in Our daily ventures together because We in the Beginning acted no different in Respect of all we met . Lighten up , the only place We see negative thoughts about Our Successful Marriage is in comments on Blogs .

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  15.   Bronco1968 says:
    Posted: 24 Apr 09

    Its all the same redoric, no matter where your from or where you go we all have the same needs ,wants and desires as a people with some minor cultuarl diferences once people realize that it will be a whole lot better!

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  16.   Glock says:
    Posted: 24 Apr 09

    You're one to be talking Homesteader about looking for women. You tell everyone you have a woman you met here, but lo and behold, you are here every day posting multiple, completely incoherent, rediculous, nonsensical statements about anything that may be on your mind at that particular second. I always scratch my head wondering what the hell you're talking about. So I go on to the next post only to find that was also written by you, as well as the next, and the next and....you get the picture. So if you have a woman, why are you here?? Spend time with the woman you came here looking for!!!! With all the beautiful woman here, and you are lucky enough to have found her, GO BE WITH HER!! If I had a significant woman I certainly would not be on this website!! It's not (not knot)the length of you statements that confuse, it's simply your statements period. If you have an IQ of 145, then I have lost all respect for there being any kind of reliable standard to test intelligence. You need to stop believing those online IQ tests!! Oh, and I wear size 12 shoe...do I get a prize?

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  17.   brandonhugs says:
    Posted: 24 Apr 09

    my head hurts...

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  18.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 23 Apr 09

    brandonhugs : Feel free to count the number of words in your last post - Then count the words in my multiple posts / Then remember if you are talking to me when I read that I shall respond accordingly . Sorry for any mis-spelled words / But I will imagine that you understand without repeated corrections . We all miss one once in a while / don't we boys . Hehe

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  19.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 23 Apr 09

    NOPLAYER ; Sorry to tell you , I never had any problem telling the Truth and it does knot require alcohol . Honesty is the sign of a True Man . And that is one thing no-one can blame on stereotypes or color of the Apple in the garden of Eden . It is a Trait that All should Display Proudly , their whole life .

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  20.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 23 Apr 09

    They aught to be looking for women , It's real easy for a Man as I found Mine here and she found Me . Enjoy Stereotyping Me if you wish boys { I do not tell long stories , I just give true thoughts as I see them ] . I will try to keep them short , so as knot to comfuse . Hometeader means Texas property owner , Not a small firearm name [ pistol pete } at a Date Ting site . Point that thing at someone else . My I.Q. IS RATED AT 145 , MY SHOE SIZE IS 10 and I never meet any Ladies on the street that at least do not say " Howdy " to Me Hehe .

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  21.   BrownB09 says:
    Posted: 23 Apr 09

    Hey Glock and Brandonhugs, leave Homesteader alone! LOL!!!LMAO!!!!

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  22.   Glock says:
    Posted: 23 Apr 09

    The only thing I will say this evening that I agree with is...I agree with brandonhugs when he asked homesteader to limit his responses to 1 a day. Hell, I'd settle for just 2 a day. But man..when you post multiple for EACH blog, that is quite too much!

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  23. Posted: 22 Apr 09

    LAWDY LAWDY...........CAN'T WE ALL JUST GET ALONG!!!!

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  24.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 09

    Sorry when you talked of white males / I looked at myself and thought that I was part of your conversation topic . I guess you are correct as you used my screen name the paragraph after that stereotyped statement . I am correct as per definition of " Bigot " in my prior comment . You are understanding what I write , Congradulations

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  25.   brandonhugs says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 09

    uh...can someone please tell me where I said something to homesteader about him being a white male? I asked him to please limit his rambling off-topic comments to just one a day so that we don't have to constantly be sent email about them, but for some reason, I don't think he will stop it...

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  26.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 09

    If all the people on this site were of the same Nationally , brandonhugs . Why would they call it an interracial date Ting site . Even Better , I came , I saw and we CONQUERED BEFORE - YOU STARTED TO SET THE RULES . THANK YOU . Injustice started in the beginning of time / remember Cain and Able .

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  27.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 09

    When you are speaking of the Majority of Us , I apologize to all who cannot comprehend that of which I speak . White males are just people also . Please feel free to reread what I wrote and you shall see that my boat still floats / there is some intelligence in my comments . Meanwhile , I appreciate your okay to allow " that guy again " to tell how he feels about life .

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  28.   brandonhugs says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 09

    to NOPLAYER, I agree 100&. And I also know that any white male that makes a statement like Brian did (which lagbaja61 wholeheartedly agreed to) when he said everything in society today is geared to take away white male power in all forms..well, that can only be seen as a paranoid racist statement. Unfortunately, many white men are upset that affirmative action programs are trying to change 400 years of racial injustice and so they want to abolish even the small progress that has been made. Even worse, some of those same white men date interracially and come onto sites like this one. And to homesteader, I know u enjoy writing rambling, off topic, sometimes incoherent comments all over these blogs, but can u please limit them to maybe just one a day? Because some people might not enjoy seeing email notices about new comments to this blog, and then having to say oh, its THAT guy again. I know I speak for the majority of us when I say that. Thank u for your attention to this matter.

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  29.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 09

    The psychology of psychogensis by psychasthenia of Repetition . I.e. , Human Race , lighten up Amen

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  30.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 09

    Correction ; dialogue

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  31.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 22 Apr 09

    M.Elliot ; in an open dialoge /we Man and Wife came to grow with a Lifelong Partnership . Change is when one throws the words , that they say are Subtle into the wind and in doing so shall Learn to Enjoy with Actions for All others . We are not uneducated children / any longer .

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  32.   M.Elliot says:
    Posted: 21 Apr 09

    Sorry I hit enter by mistake before editing my last post here is a re-post with some corrections. The open dialogue about the issue of race on this website is exactly what America needs. I would encourage everyone to keep an open mind and not attack but learn from each other why people perceive certain things he way they do. Only open robust and vehement debate can we all nurture the seeds of discourse that will allow this plague upon our great American society called racism to dissipate. I think it is important for each individual to understand that everyone festers some racism in them no matter what complexion your skin is. Whether you are racist against others or against your own race no one is immune to the mental sickness of racism. However, the good news is that together through open discourse which breeds knowledge of each other and our cultural differences, we as a people can begin to tackle our inabilities to overcome the complexities of difference. In transitioning, I ask everyone to observe that this is an interracial dating site. If we are to look at race through the lens of science then DNA is the microscope which opens the doorway. DNA reveals that everyone is in-fact interracial and everyone has a genetic link to Africa. Therefore, it does shock the conscious that anyone would sign up for an interracial dating site and precede to choose a racial preference of men/women to date. The mere action of choice in a mate based solely on race is in itself a manifestation of racism. Moreover, if one is to chooses to limit their pursuit of a mate only to one race and bases the initiation of contact not on the content of that persons character, but the complexion of their skin they have committed racism. Furthermore, let us consider the psychology behind another form of racism perpetuated by an individuals perception of how they perceive themselves. This form of racism is created in the individual by the individual, and is termed a self-hate complex. If an individual holds themselves out to only date individuals of a specific race while never considering individual of their own race and base their choice on attraction preference, this is racism in the form of a self-hate complex. To logically deduce that an individual does not find the opposite or same sex of their race attractive speaks to the question of how that particular individual views and feels about themselves. One cannot truly have self confidence and think they are beautiful inside and out if they find people who are similar in appearance within their own race unattractive. Transitioning further, this particular website is an interracial dang website. Which implies a willingness by the subscriber to be open and inhibited regarding their selection of a mate. Yet, racism comes into play when an overwhelming majority of subscriber purposefully and knowingly choose to select one or a few races to consider for dating purposes while excluding others. This is done by the overwhelming majority of subscribers with the prior knowledge that the choice of ALL ETHNICITIES is permitted. Keeping in mind everyone is interracial to a degree limiting yourself to only one ethnic complexion of mate is in-fact a subtle act of racism. I urge everyone to consider changing their preference to ALL ETHNICITIES as it is narrow-minded and shallow to lose out on a potential husband or wife simply for the reason of being born to dark or fair skinned.

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  33.   M.Elliot says:
    Posted: 21 Apr 09

    The open dialogue about the issue of race on this website is exactly what America needs. I would encourage everyone to keep an open mind and not attack but learn from each other why people perceive certain things he way they do. Only open robust and vehement debate can we all nurture the seeds of discourse that will allow this plague upon our great American society called racism to dissipate. I think it is important for each individual to understand that everyone festers some racism in them no matter what complexion your skin is. Whether you are racist against others or against your own race no one is immune to the mental sickness of racism. However, the good news is that together through open discourse which breeds knowledge of each other and our cultural differences, we as a people can begin to tackle to our inabilities to overcome the complexities of difference. In transitioning, I ask everyone to observe that this is an interracial dating site. If we are to look at race through the lens of science then DNA is the microscope which open the doorway. DNA reveals that everyone is in-fact interracial and everyone has a genetic link to Africa. Therefore, it does shock the conscious that anyone would sign up for an interracial dating site and precede to choose a racial preference of men/women to date. The mere action of choice in a mate based solely on race is in itself a manifestation of racism. Moreover, if one is to chooses to limit their pursuit of a mate only to one race and bases the initiation of contact not on the content of that persons character, but the complexion of their skin they have committed racism. Furthermore, let us consider the psychology behind another for of racism perpetuated by an individuals perception of how they perceive themselves. This form of racism is created in the individual by the individual, and is termed a self-hate complex. If an individual holds themselves out to only date individual of a specific race while never considering individual of their own race and basis heir choice on attraction preference, this is racism in the form of a self-hate complex. To logically deduce that an individual does not find the opposite or same sex of their race attractive speaks to the question of how that particular individual feels about themselves. One cannot truly have self confidence and think they are beautiful inside and out if they find people who are similar in appearance within their own race unattractive. Transitioning further, this particular interracial dating website is an interracial dang website. Which implies and willingness of the subscriber to be open and inhibited regarding their selection of a mate. Yet, racism comes into play when an overwhelming majority of subscriber purposefully and knowingly choose to select n one or a few races to consider for dating purposes. This is done by the overwhelming majority of subscribers with the prior knowledge that the choice of ALL ETHNICITIES is permitted. Keeping in mind everyone is interracial to a degree limiting yourself to only one ethnic complexion of mate is in-fact a subtle act of racism. I urge everyone to consider changing their preference to ALL ETHNICITIES as it is narrow-minded and shallow to lose out on a potential husband or wife simply for the reason of being born to dark or fair skinned.

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  34.   Evasalva says:
    Posted: 21 Apr 09

    My Mom is African ,a black woman and she fit all three of those categories she's submissive, nuturing and can easily emsculate a guy at the same time. So what is the purpose of this article because I don't concern myself with the media much and less of course it's fashion week lol.

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  35.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 20 Apr 09

    Stereotyped / Senior Citizen

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  36.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 20 Apr 09

    Antique Dictionary

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  37.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 20 Apr 09

    Bigot ; as per Websters Dictionary - One obstinately or intolerantly devoted to his own church , party , belief or opinion . We are probably all Bigots in the End / because we shall stick bye our own Opinions .

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  38.   NOPLAYER says:
    Posted: 20 Apr 09

    directed @ lagbaja61 " They say if you throw a rock at a pack of dogs, the first one to yelp is the one that got hit " If you are going to call me a bigot at least state the facts supporting YOUR OPINOIN! I have not called you a bigot, if I had a problem with you I'd address you directly, state the facts and go on about my business. I back up Brandonhugs statement with an example from a personal experience, I wasn't adressing my post to you. So why the backlash? I didn't even state the ethnicity of the person I was talking about in my example! I'll say this and I'm done, express yourself, it's your right, but don't get mad if some don't agree with you! Peace!

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  39.   Glock says:
    Posted: 19 Apr 09

    I know people who need NO alcohol to bring out their true feelings and/or sterotypes.

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  40.   lagbaja61 says:
    Posted: 18 Apr 09

    Brandonhugs if you think two white men aren't allowed to express how they feel discrimination works against them, that makes you the bigot. And you and Noplayer well you proved yourselves right, the bigots show themselves in the end. Luckily the people I have met on this site and outside are nothing like either of you.

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  41.   PrettyGurl says:
    Posted: 17 Apr 09

    Stereotypes do have some truth to them. I also agree with another poster that who said just because you date interracially doesnt mean you think of the other as equals.. I've seen so many times with my white male and female friends who date only "those who have light skin" like that really makes a difference but to them it does.. You should hear some of the things they believe about " black people with dark skin". Makes my stomach sick. ugh.

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  42.   homesteader says:
    Posted: 17 Apr 09

    I ; Personally came to this site to find a Companion for Life . I came looking for a Female and in doing so Found an Extended Family . My Stereotype ; AARP Member , Disabled Has Been , former " King of the Road ". Never met anone that I did not show the " Greatest Respect For " in my Personal Lifes Travels . Been a Human Being / Blessed bye God in my daily life - Still have likes and dislikes [ nobody is Perfect ] Opinions Learned over years of Observation Nationwide . As with Our President Obama , cannot make Everyone Happy / It's knot my Job .

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  43.   BrownB09 says:
    Posted: 16 Apr 09

    To lagjaba 61,Stereotypes are oversimplified, exaggerated views of reality.The only type of person who can actually think that a stereotype about a group of people are those who live their everyday lives being judgemental of others. Such a mindset repulses me, and leads me to think that this person, who refers to an interracial dating site, posesses some type of prejudice or culturally biased views of, again, someone they choose to date or who is unlike themselves. I am aware that one must categorize, thus define our surroundings espescially when it is essential such as in childrearing, education etc. But I think it would be wise to look at people as individuals and not walk around thinking you know so much about someone! This is sheer obliviousness, and might I add will not get you anywhere if you choose to date or seek friends outside of your race. Lastly people please get to know someone before dealing with them because these underlying feelings will surface and from experience, it can be very hurtful.

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  44.   dubafoot says:
    Posted: 16 Apr 09

    I have never dated outside of my race, but I would.

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  45.   elliy24 says:
    Posted: 16 Apr 09

    Stereotypes are definitely real. Surprisingly, there are loads on this site, which i think is rather weird because you would have thought pple here are civilised and have left behind racism and the like. But i think some pple just join to have an opportunity to be really racist coz it looks ok here 'interacial' dating site, we all like pple from other races (supposedly). all I can say is, be sure who your friends are before you can call them that

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  46.   nightmax says:
    Posted: 16 Apr 09

    Hi Noplayer, You know its unfortunate how these things happen and its even more unfortunate that it takes alcohol to bring the truth out, but hey if it works then it works. As was already noted, you can't see the heart of a person, but you can always measure their words and actions and judge for yourself. I don't ever compare people with myself because we have all come from varying lives, lifestyles, circumstances, but I hope in making the decision to datea person that I continue to weigh their words and actions to make an honest decision. I now don't get totally wrapped up in any man now, because I have to trust you before I feel I can get close to anyone. I dated a man for almost 2 years before I say him change from a caring person into a Jack **S. In this instance, I am glad I waited before getting really serious about him because a person who is conning another eventually becomes who he really is. In the end, I found out things I never knew about him because he kept things on the downlow for a long time. His mother finally shared a few things about her son that was the deciding factor. God always brings what in the dark into light.

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  47.   NOPLAYER says:
    Posted: 16 Apr 09

    brandonhugs you are correct in your statement, " just because someone is sexually attracted to a person from a different race, it's doesn't mean they see them as equals"! You cant see the heart of a person but you can measure their words and actions against a standard of moral correctness and judge for yourself. I believe whats in a man will come out of him under the right circumstances. You know they say children and drunks are very honest and they shoot straight from the hip. I was once at a cook out with some fellow soldiers and this sister bought along the guy she was dating. One beer too many and a heated political debate exposed this clown for the true bigot he was, I mean he really showed the real him. The sister that was with this clown was embarassed but she wasn't flamming mad like many of us were and had the nerve to try and defend his ass the next day at work. I believe this sister like many women, felt it was better to have a piece of a man, than no man at all.

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  48.   brandonhugs says:
    Posted: 16 Apr 09

    Racism is wrong. In order to discuss this issue, we must bring light into a dark area...the topic of racists that date interracially. And we have a perfect example right here. On this blog page /fyooz/why-does-she-expect-better-treatment.htm , a white man named Brian made the following comment >> Comment by Brian on 29 March 2009: These blogs are getting really weird. I understand most people hate White Male heterosexuals. Plus everything in society today is geared to take away white male power in all forms. Then "lagbaja61" made this comment>> Comment by lagbaja61 on 11 April 2009: I agree with everything Brian says (march 29). So as you can see, that is an example of two white men that feel comfortable making racist statements even while they are on an interracial dating site. And this is just one small example, I have seen many more racist statements on this site. I learned many years ago that one must be very careful when dating interracially because just because someone is sexually attracted to a different race, it doesn't mean that they see the other race as their equals. Many people like to pretend that somehow sexual attraction equals respect, but they are two totally different things. It is important to take a long time to get to know others, and to observe closely, in order to know the truth. This is only a concern if you want a real relationship based on love and respect. Of course, many of us could care less about having a real relationship and just want someone that won't be racist to our faces. And to me, that is pitiful. In any case, understand that people have many motives, some good, some bad. And it's much better to go too slow than too fast. Peace and truth.

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  49.   lagbaja61 says:
    Posted: 15 Apr 09

    Hate to say this...but I once read I forget where.... that most stereotypes are........TRUE. Business targets sterotypical markets, criminal profilers come up with profiles. And like it or not, in general they are spot on. For example, blue eyes are sexy ( he says hoping thats true!!).

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  50.   ninja39 says:
    Posted: 15 Apr 09

    In my opinion I think that a lot of stereotypes are true but who really cares. I'm an African American woman who if I was to go by the typical stereotype for my gender and race would not be much to desire. I know that I am an individual with outstanding qualities but the problem with most people is that they believe and actually live by stereotypes. People don't give other people the chances that they deserve and I don't know if it's because of fear of rejection of the fear of believing the stereotypes. We miss out on a lot of opportunities because we don't give people a chance and the funny thing is is that we want people to give us chances. The best policy is always to do unto to others as we want them to do to us.

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