Do career ambitious women put off men?

Posted by Ria, 23 Apr

"Men are threatened by my career ambitions." "Men can’t handle how successfull I am."

Those are some of the answers many successful women will answer to the questions: "Why don’t you date?" "With all you got, why the hell are you still single?" They believe their career success is 'bad' for love. Most believe men are put off by financially independent women.

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In a survey done by Elite Singles recently, one member by the name Amy said: "Men who think they earn less than me or live in a ‘worse’ area tend to shy away". And Clara from New Zealand seconded this saying: "I’ve tried dating less successful partners and paid for everything… but in the end both of us became resentful." Apparently, when a woman earns more or has more success, everything tends to be some competition of sorts: "Who can climb the corporate ladder first" kind of situations.

But much as not all successful women want 'superman', that doesn’t mean that they’d settle for any man. Betina from Ireland said she is "…only interested in something if it’s right." because she is alright on her own. And much as many admitted to being too picky when choosing men, they felt their pickiness is justified. A woman’s gotta have her standards, right? Susan said much as she is getting older, she won’t settle for less than she believes she deserves. In fact, she has become more picky with age.

Although people these days swear by the adage: "Chivalry is dead", not even a single respondent admitted to being offended by men’s chivalrous deeds; not a single one said chivalry was old fashioned. More than half still love being opened for doors by men and still find a man carrying their luggage to be "extremely attractive".

A friend of mine admitted that she could stand her husband’s sh** when she earned way less than him. But as soon as she stated climbing the corporate ladder, he became an EX in a flash. It’s like she was more patient and more willing to try and work things out when she had less than he did. Does success make women less patient in relationships?

Maybe its not the men who are threatened by success. Maybe success just make women more adamant about NOT settling for less. What do you think? And whose fault is it anyway?

1 responses to "Do career ambitious women put off men?"

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  1.   MochaFrenzy says:
    Posted: 09 May 14

    Its a two sided coin..Men say I do not want any gold diggers, and protect whatever they have striven to achieve and rightly so. After all, they may have sacrificed and poured their blood sweat and tears into their own success. Why should someone else come to take that away. On the other coin face.: Once a determined and ambitious women makes a strategic move to advance their own career and have the potential to become hugely successful, then we are accused of taking away a man's masculinity, "protective" instinct and place in a relationship. Can't win either way. Yes, I think that career ambitious women "put" men off. My ex was a Phd and I had just gotten accepted into a Masters Program after putting my educational pursuits on hold. His response to my overwhelming happiness was "You won't have time, what about the kinds, anyways, I think that I will do my Post Doc now". His ambition went as far a getting an instructor position at a local junior college where he had taught for seven years. He had never, since graduating 12 years prior produced one single paper or attended seminars or given conferences. Needless to say, we ended up terminating our relationship that very year. He knew my plans were to get my Phd at 30, way earlier that he and I was now on my way to that goal albeit a little late. I had made more money that he, but was never one to rub it in his face. It was our money as far as I was concerned but he spent it like it was only his. It has taken me years to come full circle. I believed that life had killed a dream I dreamed. So though there are struggles that I face, I will conquer them. I have a lot of goals and want to at least achieve them. I cannot give up the ghost without at least trying. So if you dare to dream then go after it. Leave all the insecurities and negativity behind. People, both men and women alike who feel threatened and intimidated by you, have issues already. Its their own negative feelings of self worth and fear feeding needy insecurities. That is something that you have no control and responsibility over. Its not up to you to make it all better, because you can't. All you can do is continue your journey.

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