Biracial and hating the other side
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This is a Tyra show video about biracial women who hate one side of their racial composition or the other.
Most biracial people find themselves struggling with identity. What am I? Black, White, Hispanic? And more often than not, they also get caught up in families, especially their grandparents, rejecting them for being biracial or having a tinge of the other race. Society also does this to them. I remember when Vanessa Williams became the first woman of African American descent to be crowned Miss America, most Black folks said she did not represent them. She wasn't Black enough.
This video brings out some really interesting issues about multiracial identity, intra-group struggles and complexion issues. Having watched the video, do you think society plays a big role in pushing us to hate who we really are? Should we excuse these biracial women's hatred for hating the "other side"?
94 responses to "Biracial and hating the other side"
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Wonka says:Posted: 06 Mar 10
I'm biracial(Trinidadian/Irish)and I hate neitherside,I don't struggle with Identity,and when someone asks me what am I,I simply say Human American(LoL!).Unless,they ask me what's my nationality,then I say I'm Trinidadian.
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Member says:Posted: 07 Jan 10
When I first entered university, I was living on my own and had to pay my own bills. So for two years I got by working the night shift in a factory. Athough study during the day and work during the night took a toll on my body, it was a great time in my life and I remember those days with great fondness. On my first day on the job I was taken around by the Supervisor and introduced to the other guys on the shift. The machinary was loud and everyone wore ear plugs, so the initial introductions were brief and relied mostly on a few loudly spoken words, and some facial gestures. I clearly remember the first guy I was introduced to that night, being a young man called Adam. Now Adam looked for the most part to be Chinese, but like many eurasians, something about him looked different. When I was first introduced to him I could not hear him speak because of the noise, and his features were partly obscured by the safety gear he had on. I later found out that he was born in the US, spoke with an American accent, and had a Polish father. As time moved on, I realised, as all the other guys on the shift knew only too well, that Adam never mentioned his mother, nor his self-evident part-chinese lineage. Because of this, during our mealtimes Adam bore the brunt of many sarcastic comments about his background. Some guys would ask: "Adam, are you Chinese?" To which he would respond by saying that "No, I am an American with a Polish father" When asked if his mother was Chinese, Adam would often use profanities, get up and leave the table in a huff. Everyone would chuckle as a result, because it was clear that Adam had an issue with being referred to as Chinese. I remember feeling quite embarassed for him, and wondered how his mother would have felt knowing the extent he would go to hide his Chinese background. Well, things sometimes go full circle, and here I am now the father of a bi-racial child. For me, it would be a nightmare magnified ten-fold if my son ever behaved like he was embarassed of his Chinese or Anglo lineage. Although at the end of the day I hope that my son sees himself as an Australian first and foremost, I hope he always recognises how lucky he is to come from two proud, enriched and admirable cultures. I hope that he can embrace both parts of his identity equally, and take from them what he need to carve his own identity in this world.
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miri2008 says:Posted: 30 Aug 09Tyra remains true to form... never deviates lol... for some reason Ria sees Tyra's shows as post worthy... I think it's about time we give Maury equal air time... lol
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Salsassin says:Posted: 25 Jun 09
LOL. Where you talking to me? I speak of Afrodescendant experience from my experience AND from the experience of living with part of my family that is Afrodescent and show it in their features. LOL. Experience can be indirect. PLus, all Afrodescendants don't look "Black". So don't assume looking "Black" is the only Afrodescendant expereince. Most Dominicans do not deny their African ancestry. They just don't see themselves by Black trumps all standards.
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TJ says:Posted: 25 Jun 09
WTF Dude... Ur Not Even Black Nor Do You Have A True Experience Of How It Feels 2 Be Seen As A African Decendent So How Can You Say How They Feel Or Why Many Of THem Dont Want 2 B Seen As Black(African)!!!! In My Eyes You look Straight Up WHITE( Caucasuian) ............... But Any Way... Black Is Beautiful, Hispanic is Beautiful, Asian Is Beautiful, White Is Beautiful, Native Is Beautiful, ETC All Of These Races and Cultures Have Their Share Of Problems & Differences & As You All Say " Most Dominicans Deny Their Black Ancestry" And 4 That Quote.... Who Said that Thay Had 2 b black if they dont wanna b black then o well let them be who they wanna because regardless of who they wanna be The African Decending Humans On This Earth Still Will Embrace their Culture Regardless Who Likes it Or Not!!!
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snickawinn says:Posted: 12 May 09
I admit I was shocked when I saw a few of these women reveal their ethnicity, but not with most of them. I am African American, Native American, Irish on mom's side and straight African on my father's side. Although I am dark and all of my other family members and siblings on mom's side are light-skinned, I have never been confused about who I was other than not knowing the African people on my father's side. I was brought up in Catholic schools so there were always children of other races. I have always loved every culture, and I can honestly say that I have only been discriminated against (to my face) a few times. I mostly date white men so I have occasionally gotten other black people ask why I only seem to date white. I tell them it is because they are the only men who approach me for some reason. I love men of all races and even have 2 black children. WHen I have gone on job interviews, I never walked into a room thinking I had my color working against me. I just always stayed true to myself and shown people what I can offer as a person with intelligence. It has always worked for me. I am successful with my own day spa, and plenty of high-class white clients who treat me as a normal human being and in some cases, friend. It's unfortunate how we still have to worry about things like this in this day and age, especially with so many mixed-raced people and interracial couples around the world. Until things change, I will still do my part. Unless you, individually give me a reason to not like you, I will.
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NOPLAYER says:Posted: 06 Apr 09Belle you have a good point. I believe that people should travel more and see different parts of the world. I think here in Europe and in South America and they are not as hung up about IR relationships. I have been to parts of the Middle East and Asia where they have such deep rooted traditions and where they arrange marriages, so IR is not too common in those parts of the world. America and her issues with race is a problem that goes back a few centeries and you wont change centeries over night. Hopefully as the younger generation of Americans get out and see the world they see that the world is not all blk and wht.
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Belle says:Posted: 06 Apr 09
Just in america that race is such a big thing!You guys should go around the world and have a look into the world cause this whole thing is pretty silly... kisses from Brasil
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Salsassin says:Posted: 25 Mar 09
Ooops wrong thread. I was cutting and pasting an old post from here elsewhere. Sorry.
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Salsassin says:Posted: 25 Mar 09
Oh shit, I missed AALove’s last post when I debated with Laurelton. I see your lack of logic didn’t disappoint. You state that Afro Latinos didn’t this economy, so they don’t have a say. Neither did White Latinos exploit Blacks in this economy, yet you put them in the equation. The point remains that Afro-Latinos experience the same discrimination African Americans do in this country, yet they do not carry the same stigmas you do. Slavery was abolished there over 150 years ago and we never had Jim Crow. And my family descends from European, Native and African. SO we don’t owe shit to anyone. You can make a ton of claims of probabilities, but you have yet to show one credible bit of evidence that Willie Lynch existed. I already pointed out why colorism existed way before Willie Lynch. “Light skin vs. dark skin colorism basically arose from a few factors. One is from actual native traditions that have been common the world over. Upper class in almost all continents has avoided tanning and it’s damage to the skin, while the working class toiled on the fields and had rich tans. So early in history there has been a tradition of colorism through out many civilizations including Africa of darker (as in tanned) being frowned on. But over millennia it has lead to many favoring lighter skin for the obvious reason that it enhanced that difference. In the industrial world, that trend has actually been reversed to a degree, as tans became a sign of wealth and an active life style. So now we are seeing a trend where medium complexions are the most favored. Not too light and not too dark. That is one factor. Second ancient trend: As farming started to develop, so did concentrated settlements. But originally farming diets where not that healthy or balanced. In fact, fact they blocked a lot of absorption of much needed Vitamin D. So you see a slight lightening of the skin in farming populations vs. hunter-gatherers. Obviously when diets became more balanced, this was no longer a major issue, but it did lead to a slight lightening of populations through the entire Fertile Crescent, North Africa, China and India. Think of Middle Eastern and North African people today. This may have lead to the prior trend I mentioned of upper class vs. lower class, but also between populations. By the way, overall, women are also lighter than men for the same reason. They need more vitamin D during gestation, so except for the places of highest radiation, women tend to have developed slightly lighter skin than men. So those are global trends that have existed. Particular to the Americas and Africa: In Africa you have the lighter skinned populations of North Africa, but you also have the Arab slave traders since 100 AD who excursioned through out Africa and also mixed in many places. Many of their progeny also continued the slave trade creating dichotomies of darker vs. lighter as seen to this day in places like Sudan and the Maghreb. In the US and Latin America: Many of the first Africans to come to the US where freemen, not slaves, and there where no miscegenation laws so many mixed with European descent people. As well as some migrants from the Northern parts of Africa. As free people they also were able to develop and accumulate generational wealth. You see a lot of their descendants in old lineage upper class Black America in New England as well as well as parts of the south with the Gens de Colour. SO you had the dichotomy of the freeman vs. the slave who was brought predominantly from the darker regions of Africa like Angola. And unfortunately this led to a second dichotomy. You had the mulatto and light skinned Black populations that were predominantly lighter (comparatively) and you had the predominantly darker slave populations. You also had a trend for a while of giving more rights to Indian populations who were comparatively lighter and whose children with Whites were also classified as mulatto in early America. So that added to that dichotomy. That was the base of colorism. Add to that, in slavery, contrary to popular urban mythology, it wasn’t being Black that made you a slave; it was who your mother was. Matrilinealism. So, there where many slaves who descended from the Irish slaves that were brought over who were predominantly women. Many slave masters would favor mixed descent slaves, not because of some false Willie Lynch Machiavellian plan, but simply because they resembled them more. Subconscious comfort zones. (Of course, this was not always a bonus. Many times lighter skinned slaves would get the wrath of the female spouse because they were suspected as illegitimate children of the slave master and evidence of his infidelity. Or many times they were victimized as rape victims at higher rates when they were available because they carried trends of beauty that were more Eurocentric as well as Afrocentric trends of beauty.) Ultimately though, all these populations got integrated during Jim Crow and many of these trends remained subconsciously, or in many cases just the perception of those differences. Unappreciation of the darkest women. (Both because of light skin and dark skin dichotomy and gender difference in colors dichotomy where lighter skin is seen as more feminine where darker is seen as more masculine) And with the trend reversal in industrialized nations, the real light skins lost a lot of their appeal as being seen as unhealthy, white trash, etc. So the media has glorified medium complexions. From the tanned golden Eurocentric look (either by tan or by regular pigmentation) to the mahogany type complexions that you see predominantly in Black media all the time. You rarely see the lightest and darkest complexions in Black media. These subconscious biases are of course completely inaccurate and based on millennia of feudalistic societies. Dark skin is actually healthier than light skin, in many ways, and is less susceptible to the ravages of solar radiation. (It also is at larger risk for developing melanomas that are detected at much more advanced stages though), so in terms of ageless beauty, dark skinned women have the upper hand. (Another reason many of the lighter skinned populations may have stayed out of the sun and “prided” themselves on their light skinned beauty. They had to stay out of the sun if they wanted to maintain it, or wrinkle up a lot quicker). In today’s, world, all those ancient reasons for colorism are just plain stupid. But unfortunately we are still dealing with many of the subconscious biases that are perpetuated by culture to this day. I have dated African women who are extremely beautiful in their dark complexions, yet I really don’t see them in represented in the Black media in the US. And I have seen light skinned beautiful Black women who are also rarely represented. Usually they have to sport a tan at least. If they have more Eurocentric facial features, then Eurocentric beauty standards apply as she is appealing to the larger community, but if the woman is light skinned and has more Afrocentric features, she faces the uphill battle of people thinking she has colorism privileges because she is light (Even though medium toned complexions are far more popular) and discrimination because she has more Afrocentric features as well. I’ve actually conducted experiments with facial features (Yes I studied social psychology and anthropology so these issues interest me) and have taken a broad featured darker skinned woman (more Afrocentric beauty) and a light skinned thin featured woman (more Eurocentric beauty) and digitally created all the facial features possible in between them from medium complexions and medium width phenotypes to light skinned faces with broad features, to dark skinned faces with thin features to combined broad and thin features with all three skin tones. In controlled tests of peoples tastes (you see two images, and you choose one, then you go to the next, same thing) Overall the medium complexioned medium ranged facial featured women always got the most hits) So obviously colorism does play a role, but so does facial structure biases, and the ones that are getting the most attention are not the lightest, but the medium complexioned looks with medium features. Sad, but that is the way perception is today. Personally, I find beauty in all skin color ranges and facial structure ranges. And hopefully with time these biases will diminish and disappear. “ I am well aware of the exploitation of Chattel slavery and its evils. And the people who perpetuated it are not the people alive today. So you still don’t have a valid point. LMAO. The Catholic Church started Chattel slavery? What a fool. Arabs started their slave trade around the time of Christ. Way before the Catholic Church even existed. LOL. Sorry bub, I debate with intelligent Black men all the time. I don't waste my time with meat heads such as yourself. You obviously are frustrated and your post shows it. I am not afraid of expressing my opinion in the face of anyone. But as a lawyer, I am not going to actively pursue a confrontation that could affect my career; I wouldn't risk a fight with a moron. I live in Decatur. Good luck driving around trying to find me. Internet bravado is always entertaining.
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YngCaramelQT says:Posted: 02 Feb 09What's interesting to me is that people get so caught up in race that they fail to realize the difference between race and ethnicity. So this show did not just deal with bi-racial beings. It also dealt with people of the same race hating different ethnicities (for example the Korean that doesn't like Chinese, and the Chinese girl that doesn't like Koreans). I didn't really see many people on there that actually HATE one of their two races (only two of the first four girls). The girl that was obviously Latino (her mom was Black and her dad Latino) only claimed to be Black because she couldn't identify with being Latino...her father was never there. There's nothing wrong with identifying with one race more than another, it's when a person is ashamed of and/or denies a race that it becomes a problem. I wonder if they realize they are basically disowning one of their parents, and their ancestors on that side. The rest of the show was just stupid. It was nothing but stereotypes....like "based on this persons silhouette what race do you think they are?" That segment was just asinine. However, the "you have it easier because you're light-skinned/dark-skinned" argument should be something she spends time on (since she likes to focus on race issues so much). She didn't try to get to the core of the problem, she just told them they had more in common and needed to talk to each other about it. As big of an issue as it is among Black Americans, it deserves its own episode. Not to lay it out like "boom, it's a problem, deal with it," like she did in that segment, but to actually look into the reasons and offer up a solution.
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chika507 says:Posted: 16 Jan 09
THIS IS WHATS HAPPENING TO ME RIGHT NOW IN SCHOOL AND IN PUBLIC...IN SCHOOL MY FRIENDS OR MY CLASSMATES THINK THAT IM MEXICAN UNTIL I START SPEAKING SPANISH AND THATS WHEN THEY RELIZED THAT IM NOT JUST MEXICAN...IM HALF PANAMANIAN AND HALF MEXICAN...MY MOM IS FROM PANAMA AND MY DAD IS FROM MEXICO.....AND WHEN THEY ASK ME WHAT TYPE OF MUSIC I LISTEN TO I ALWAYS TELL THEM THAT I ONLY LISTEN TO TROPICAL MUSIC AND NOT MEXICAN MUSIC...IT REALLY EXASPERATES ME IM NOT JUST MEXICAN IM PANAMANIAN AND MEXICAN ....IM NOT HATING ON MY OTHER SIDE BUT REALLY IS JUST ANNOYING HOW PEOPLE CAN BE SO IGNORENT ....
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NOPLAYER says:Posted: 10 Jan 09
Skin color is just that but a culture is intirely different. I believe that there are people around the world of African origin that have been taught to believe that Africa or anything associated with Africa is bad. People must educate themselves and not be so smalled minded. I'm a blackman from St. Louis and I can see beauty and I'm appreciative of the contribution of all people of this planet. If only people could travel and broaden their scope of life. The world is much bigger than where you live, people are the same but in some ways different than those you grew up around. As a US Army veteran I've had the chance to travel around the world and experience different things so my outlook on life is different than alot of people. You dont have to travel the world to broaden your scope go to the cultural festivals in your city, go to a reasturant other than Chinese or Mexican or make an aquaintance of a different culture. By learning and seeing value in others you grow to love and appreciate the uniqueness of your own culture.
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laugh_sailor says:Posted: 10 Jan 09Thanks, Salsassin, for your excellent history of skin color preferences - I've known much of it but have never had it presented as a cohesive whole. It's a pleasure seeing the forest in addition to the trees.
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Salsassin says:Posted: 10 Jan 09
I'm always entertained when people with anonymous ID's make any sort of comment. Troll, I can dance circles around your retarded ass.
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Julia says:Posted: 09 Jan 09
Holy Sh*t!!! Are you people still talking about this?!?!? Can Mr. Two Left Feet (aka "Salsassin"...still brings giggles!) just be ignored!!! PLEASE!!! Turn the page...move on...get a life...
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lala2qz says:Posted: 09 Jan 09
Huh??? you're silly, I would definitely not pay for that. But to each their own. :) But hey, I'm just pointing out the fact that you brought in a TON of useless info to counter what I was saying. Which is why I kept going, otherwise, I really had no reason to respond unless to provoke a response from you. But ultimately, I got what you were trying to say a while ago, but I felt you were throwing accusations at me when much of it was nothing to do with me but purposely aimed towards me. Which I thought was weird because I was talking about hate and denial, and besides I threw myself under the bus in my second post, to show that I really have no problem with identity issues because I clearly had a load of my own. So yea, I did notice that you like to debate. I did get to you in a degree and I could see it in your responses. I was in the mood for it, but got tired of it because it seemed like a pointless one and that you were arguing against something I didn't really do in the first place. Okay, so on to something else. The lighter skinned thing has it's truths, as I got older I remember being influenced to feel that I was better because I am mixed and because of my hair and also because my skin isn't as dark as alot of black people's. Aww but that ultimately gave me a few issues, cause I think that deep dark skin is beautiful and I don't think lowly of black and being half black. I personally didn't like being called a yellow bone or being compared to a moon pie(haha, yea, a moonpie). I think it's a wonderful thing. I think hate is a horrid thing. Which is why I don't think kindly of the first girl from the video because she is filled with it. Her hate makes her hate herself, she feels she should be lighter when her skin is lovely. I don't feel above her because I am lighter, I do because of other reasons, so I don't see why she thinks she would be a higher being to be my color or lighter. And... when you commented that alot of mixed children migrate towards the multicultural thing, you had a point, I went through that stage, my ex who is also mixed did the same thing. He wanted us to have an Oreo Island or something. But he identifies as black also. Me personally, I know people aren't unjustly accusing some groups like that of thinking they are better, cause ummm.... being a part of it I know many that do. Who have issues of their own and put down black people who arent mixed to feel better about themselves.
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Salsassin says:Posted: 09 Jan 09
To aeon: It doesn't matter what you are called, it is what you respond to. Consider this, many Native Americans look Asian, or Latino. Many African Americans look Dominican, or Middle Eastern. And they are constantly questioned on their identity. But that does not change who they are. Both what you are raised as and what you are exposed as growing up in the public arena affect how your identity is formed, but once it's there, no one can claim you re something else. I have plenty of friends who are now on the pro Mulatto identity thing. Whatever works for them. But just because they want Obama to identify as such, doesn't make him so. He identifies as Black, so that is what he is. Now his brother in China does not identify as Black and he isn't. to vt33: I do agree this society has a trend of teaching hate and separatism. Light skin vs dark skin colorism basically arose from a few factors. One is from actual native traditions that have been common the world over. Upper class in almost all continents has avoided tanning and it's damage to the skin, while the working class toiled on the fields and had rich tans. So early in history there has been a tradition of colorism through out many civilizations including Africa of darker (as in tanned) being frowned on. But over millenia it has lead to many favoring lighter skin for the obvious reason that it enhanced that difference. In the industrial world, that trend has actually been reversed to a degree as tans became a sign of wealth and an active life style. So now we are seeing a trend where medium complexions are the most favored. not too light and not too dark. That is one factor. Second ancient trend: As farming started to develop, so did concentrated settlements. But originally farming diets where not that healthy or balanced. In fact, fact they blocked a lot of absorption of much needed Vitamin D. So you see a slight lightening of the skin in farming populations vs hunter gatherers. Obviously when diets became more balanced, this was no longer a major issue, but it did lead to a slight lightening of populations through the entire fertile crescent, North Africa, China and India. Think of Middle Eastern and North African people today. This may have lead to the prior trend I mentioned of upper class vs lower class, but also between populations. By the way, overall, women are also lighter than men for the same reason. They need more vitamin D during gestation, so except for the places of highest radiation, women tend to have developed slightly lighter skin than men. So those are global trends that have existed. Particular to the Americas and Africa: In Africa you have the lighter skinned populations of North Africa, but you also have the Arab slave traders since 100 AD who excursioned through out Africa and also mixed in many places. Many of their progeny also continued the slave trade creating dichotomies of darker vs lighter as seen to this day in places like Sudan and the Maghreb. In the US and Latin America: Many of the first Africans to come to the US where freemen, not slaves, and there where no miscegenation laws so many mixed with European descent people. As well as some migrants from the Northern parts of Africa. As free people they also were able to develop and accumulate generational wealth. You see a lot of their descendants in old lineage upper class Black America in New England as well as well as parts of the south with the Gens de Colour. SO you had the dichotomy of the freeman vs the slave who was brought predominantly from the darker regions of Africa like Angola. And unfortunately this led to a second dichotomy. You had the mulatto and light skinned Black populations that were predominantly lighter (comparatively) and you had the predominantly darker slave populations. You also had a trend for a while of giving more rights to Indian populations who were comparatively lighter and whose children with Whites were also classified as mulatto in early America. So that added to that dichotomy. That was the base of colorism. Add to that, in slavery, contrary to popular urban mythology, it wasn't being Black that made you a slave, it was who your mother was. Matrilinealism. So there where many slaves who descended from the Irish slaves that were brought over who were predominantly women. Many slave masters would favor mixed descent slaves, not because of some false Willie Lynch Machiavellian plan, but simply because they resembled them more. Subconscious comfort zones. (Of course, this was not always a bonus. Many times lighter skinned slaves would get the wrath of the female spouse because they were suspected as illegitimate children of the slavemaster and evidence of his infidelity. Or many times they were victimized as rape victims at higher rates when they were available because they carried trends of beauty that were more Eurocentric as well as Afrocentric trends of beauty.) Ultimately though, all these populations got integrated during Jim Crow and many of these trends remained subconsciously, or in many cases just the perception of those differences. Unappreciation of the darkest women. (Both because of light skin and dark skin dichotomy and gender difference in colors dichotomy where lighter skin is seen as more feminine where darker is seen as more masculine) And with the trend reversal in industrialized nations, the real light skins lost a lot of their appeal as being seen as unhealthy, white trash, etc. So medium complexions have been glorified by the media. From the tanned golden Eurocentric look (either by tan or by regular pigmentation) to the mahogany type complexions that you see predominantly in Black media all the time. You rarely see the lightest and darkest complexions in Black media. These subconscious biases are of course completely inaccurate and based on millenia of feudalistic societies. Dark skin is actually healthier than light skin, in many ways, and is less susceptible to the ravages of solar radiation. (It also is at larger risk for developing melanomas that are detected at much more advanced stages though), so in terms of ageless beauty, dark skinned women have the upper hand. (another reason many of the lighter skinned populations may have stayed out of the sun and "prided" themselves on their light skinned beauty. They had to stay out of the sun if they wanted to maintain it, or wrinkle up a lot quicker). In today's, world, all those ancient reasons for colorism are just plain stupid. But unfortunately we are still dealing with many of the subconscious biases that are perpetuated by culture to this day. I have dated African women who are extremely beautiful in their dark complexions, yet I really don't see them in represented in the Black media in the US. And I have seen light skinned beautiful Black women who are also rarely represented. Usually they have to sport a tan at least. If they have more Eurocentric facial features, then Eurocentric beauty standards apply as she is appealing to the larger community, but if the woman is light skinned and has more Afrocentric features, she faces the uphill battle of people thinking she has colorism privileges because she is light (Even though medium toned complexions are far more popular) and discrimination because she has more Afrocentric features as well. I've actually conducted experiments with facial features (Yes I studied social psychology and anthropology so these issues interest me) and have taken a broad featured darker skinned woman (more Afrocentric beauty) and a light skinned thin featured woman (more Eurocentric beauty) and digitally created all the facial features possible in between them from medium complexions and medium width phenotypes to light skinned faces with broad features, to dark skinned faces with thin features to combined broad and thin features with all three skin tones. In controlled tests of peoples tastes (you see two images, and you choose one, then you go to the next, same thing) Overall the medium complected medium ranged facial featured women always got the most hits) So obviously colorism does play a role, but so does facial structure biases, and the ones that are getting the most attention are not the lightest, but the the medium complected looks with medium features. Sad, but that is the way perception is today. Personally, I find beauty in all skin color ranges and facial structure ranges. And hopefully with time these biases will diminish and disappear. to hawkercat I couldn't agree with you more, but with a caveat. Like I said before, that mixed look is very popular right now. Heck I have cousins and siblings who get all the love because of it. But there is also beauty that is more on the extreme of human variability, and that type of beauty tends to go unrecognized. Because of classist appeals of extreme light skin from Europe and North Asia, the light skinned beauties with more Eurocentric or Asiocentric appeal are still admired a lot, that trend may have been challenged by the new tanned trend, but still has it's strong supporters. Even dark skinned women with more Eurocentric or Asiocentric features get a lot of attention because of their exoticness (less common) But the one group that has been marginalized the most is dark skinned women with medium to broad features. Alek Wek is very uncommon in the media. Yet beautiful women in this range abound. I hope the media will someday realize their underepresentation of this population (Which is a much larger segment of the African American community than many of the mohagony beauties they constantly highlight in the media) and exemplify dark skinned medium to broad featured beauty common in Africa, the Caribbean and also very common in the African American community. to lala2qz: LOL. Yes I paid for one month of membership. After joining out of curiosity I played the Yes, No, Maybe game. KInd of like the Hot or Not sites. Where you go through a bunch of pictures and rate them. Hot=Yes, Not=No, In between=Maybe. It was fun and I didn't think much of it. What I didn't know was that if any person has filters set up, and you do not fit their exact preference (They checked outdoors, and you didn't check that), an aoutomatic rejection letter is sent out. "Sorry, we are not a match". Next thing I know (I didn't have a completed profile so I hadn't checked a lot of things), I got a ton of rejection emails. My ego kicked in and I paid the one months fee just to send all of them an email saying that I wasn't trying to pick them up, but was just complimenting them on their beauty. No offense intended. :) Yeah, I can be petty like that. Of course then I got a ton of responses from people who said they never sent me anything. So I made many acquaintances by accident. LOL. I am back to the unpaid membership now. But I have met some cool people so the one month was worth it. You attacked Dominicans in general as a trend. I happen to have lived in the DR, el Cibao, to be exact, have had a few Dominican girlfriends and many Dominican friends. So while I have seen colorism, I resent when they are attacked for colorism that exists throughout the AfroDiaspora. The only problem people REALLY have with the DR is that they are not raised with a One Droppist mentality and thus were not raised in their majority as Black identified, and two their historical animosity with Haitians who auto identify as Black nationally. In juxtaposition, many Dominicans identify as Mulato or Indio, to contrast with the Haitian identity. LOL You didn't rile me up. I like debating, and I like sharing information, if you haven't figured it out by now. So I had no problem with the tit for tat. I just followed your cue as to the level of the debate. I do stick to what I know is fact. I won't just play Devil's Advocate and argue something I don't believe in or that I know not to be factual. The only thing I find annoying is when my posts are moderated for content. LOL.
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lala2qz says:Posted: 09 Jan 09
But you did misinterpret my first post. Yes, I did indeed attack you, but aside from that; I only agreed that there are some Dominicans that deny and hate having any African ancestry. I also pointed out the fact that the girl hates that she's half black even though when she looks in the mirror, she herself sees a black face(which she stated). So I wasn't denying anything I said, you read it wrong. And you did attack me on the "not IDENTIFYING as black" thing several times. You now say it wasn't addressed to me, but you specifically pointed me out.
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lala2qz says:Posted: 09 Jan 09
so basically.... you pay for a membership out of curiosity?? hmm.... and I know you pay because of the messages you sent me.. I joined out of curiosity, and as a nonpaying member, I can say that if that were the case for you, there really would be no reason to pay. anywho, I didnt attack anyone besides you and... MYSELF, oh and.... that girl when I said that she is facially challenged. I agreed with a comment made that there are quite a few that deny African ancestry. Like I said, you're the one jumping to conclusions. I have no problem with others identity, you kept saying I did and that's how that argument kept going. But... oh I was definitely being quite childish in some responses, sorry about that. Was going for your reaction more than anything.... it entertained me at the moment. I apologize, sincerely. I know I can be a bit mischievously quarrelsome at times when I dislike someone to a certain degree and purposely go for their -i can't think of the word right now-. You made such a big deal out of this whole thing, I knew every little thing would provoke you, sooo.... I'm sorry.
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Salsassin says:Posted: 06 Jan 09
Brazil, has racism like many other places, but it varies by region and class. Just like the US. The US has a lot more racial tension than in Brazil, but it also has a lot more class mobility. In Brazil, overall admixture has been a lot higher, but class still goes hand in had with exclusion, and the higher classes will exclude poorer people who look less White. Having said that, you will find poor Whites living side by side with Blacks in the favelas, that are not raised with the antagonism that you see across class lines here in the US. It is comparing apples and oranges. Both places have their negative aspects. What you do not hear is the kind of violence that occurs in the US like the murder of that Black girl in Florida by a white dude or that interracial couple in California by 4 black dudes. Colorism is still alive in Brazil, like many places in the Caribbean and Afro Americana, but there is not the same level of racial tension as exhibited in certain regions of the US. Confederates did migrate to Brazil because of farming opportunities and escaping the loss of the war. The town is called Americana near Sao Paolo. But they did not perpetuate their racism with them over there, Brazil was still a slave state at the time. And yet most did not own slaves over there. In fact, many of them actually mixed with the local population and many are Afrodescent today. There was a story the other day of how some of them came to the US and where shocked at what the confederate flag meant in the USA, because over there it meant something very different. Not racist at all. Wikipedia has a decent article on them under Confederados. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Confederados
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life2go says:Posted: 06 Jan 09
I'm black and I love it. People can be racist, hate me because of my skin, ignore me because of my skin, or love me because of my skin and guess what? I don't give a rats behind because I will wake up looking in the mirror loving my full lips, curvacious figure, and my super-strength which is required to wade through all the "brown" woman haters. Whether people love you or hate you - you have to love you cause if you don't the haters will infect your mind. This conversation got really deep and about half way through I was getting restless so I just wanted to throw in my 2 cents. Most of my black friends and family are brown, not light, black and in my 29 years I've only heard one make a comment about light skin women being stuck up... on the flip I have had many light skin women, whom I befriended, assume I or brown skinned women held some animosity for their color which is crazy because I have friends who are not near white, but they are White so why would I dislike a light-black person? Silly. Also the woman that was practically like my 2nd mother, my moms best friend, is a very light, blonde, light eyed black woman. It never occurred to me this was a serious issue until my 20's because it never really touched me growing up. This still amazes me everyday. I will say though, I am sickened by the media who seems to have glommed onto this weakness in the black community and they run with it every chance they get. Disgusted. Ooops I didn't mean to rant. These blogs are dangerous. :^) By the way someone was mentioning earlier about going to Brazil with your brown skin to be better accepted... ummm... I think you may want to research that further because that is a perpetuated myth. Yes Brazil is a diverse mix, so is America, but that doesn't mean that "diversity" on the darker end of the stick is treated any better there. If you don't believe me read The Unedited Diaries of Carolina Maria de Jesus. This very successful author had to pay her maid, in Brazil, extra money because the more Euro looking brazilian maid resented having to work for this more African looking brazilian woman. Better yet just google "racism in Brazil." Also read about how the Confederacy migrated to Brazil after the Civil War. They took their racism with them. Colorism is alive and well in all aspects of the world, even Africa. I say Colorism because it is becoming less about race. It is about skin color and following that facial features.
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hawkercat says:Posted: 02 Jan 09I believe it is one of the most ignorant things in the world to judge someone by color. Are we going to judge other things by color? I dont like this horse it is spotted get it away, I dont like this cat it is white, I dont like this dog it is too dark get it away, I dont like these red flowers destroy them. That is how stupid it sounds to me when people talk about prejudice and color. Look at the world we have been given, there is an abundance of variety and color. It is all beautiful beyond words. Talk of 5 races confuses me. Look at other species. How many different breeds (races) there are among horses, dogs, cats, etc. Each of these breeds have their own distinct features. And you will notice when they are allowed to breed only in their breed with no new gene pool being introduced bad things happen. some are born deformed, deaf, and/or blind. In humans interbreeding in sects has produced genetic deases. I believe we were meant to interbreed as much as possible to keep the gene pools healthy and to beautify the world with the variety of people we can produce. I have 3 children who are mixed. They all consider themselves to be just that 'a mix' not just of black and white but Native American as well. Viva la difference !
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vt33 says:Posted: 02 Jan 09Ladies and Gents you can pull every book out, read every quote, look up every detail, research ancestry, scratch the itch basically. What it really boils down to is, in our society, we teach hate, subliminally in a lot of cases. I am a seventies baby and growing up partially in the inner city, that was where I was taught the diffrence between light and dark skinned blacks. Kids I played with would pick on kids that were darker I didn't understand the difference until I became a teenager, it was more accepted to be light skinned or "indian in my family" then just dark. I'm still trying to figure out where that came from. I heard it started from slavery, light skin was put in the house to work, the darks out in the fields. Shame how it still rings true over a hundred years later. Light on top dark on bottom, mixed overall better. I sympathize with some of the guest on Tyras show, because people teach them to hate themselves by treatment of them in our society. Pecola Breedlove, black deemed ugly, and picked on, Janie Crawford, beauty, Celie Johnosn, "you sho is ugly". That just books and film. I have always thought it was cool to be of multi cultures, it gives the person an extra added self history to explore. Embracing who you are should never been a reason to hate what you are. Society needs to practice each one teach one, and quit seperating colors, people are people, color doesn't define you but with shows like this it can damn well break you. Ciao!
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aeon says:Posted: 26 Dec 08
people can identify there self as want they want but people are still goin 2 c u as wat they c of you my father is wht,filipino,and japanese with blue eyes and blond hair and my mother is black and im multiracial ppl ask me i tell them im blk japanese wht filipino
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starthai says:Posted: 26 Dec 08Excuse my ignorance Me for not realizing your not stepping on my toes. I didn't realize there was a babe_4_u. I need to read the names of each comment for now on.
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starthai says:Posted: 26 Dec 08
To me: "babe_4_u, you are an idiot!" Oh really?? I welcome you to articulate that my dear. BTW I'm not your babe.
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homesteader says:Posted: 25 Dec 08
In conclusion : what I see here is the inexperience of youth , at 60 years old and traveling 48 States and Canada . Doing business with many thousands of different people in many lines of employment / Restaurants , Truckstops , garages , warehouses offices and people on the streets in these many cities in all these States . And I found several things , we all got to work , eat talk and mingle everyday with others . All of different Heritages , with age I learned we all are the same as we put our pants on one leg at a time . I was taught Judge not for yee shall be Judged , if someone does not respect you , just say Thank you and turn and walk away . As I have never met you alas I assume that you are Magnificent in your own way . Love Les P.S. You is meant to be interpreted in the plural sense as I am talking to All not one . Thank you .
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caribqueen81 says:Posted: 25 Dec 08
I wish I could "lock" this "discussion". I've created a monster. Please, e-friggin-nough! This thing took on a whole 'nother life and I want it dead. I've stepped up and have taken responsibility, now please, let's kill this.
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Salsassin says:Posted: 25 Dec 08
LOL. Your assumption is that I joined to meet a soul mate. I actually joined because of a debate I was having on another board. It led me here and I joined out of curiosity. You did not just attack that girl, you attacked Dominicans in general. So spare me the hypocrisy. I already stated what I agreed and disagreed with her identity and her self hate.
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lala_ says:Posted: 25 Dec 08
This has become quite lame. Tell me how many 18 year olds have developed the since of maturity and frame of mind that you are expected to have at an age such as yours? Not many at all, some things come with life experience and time. So, if you think you should be on the same level of the average 18/19 year old "adult", then that's very disappointing. You attacked me several times about self identity, even right after I mentioned the fact that I'm speaking about hate. Remember you saying that people like me want to have their choice but not let others have theirs? Must've slipped your mind. So, though I don't have a problem with it, I continued to respond because you continued to accuse me of that. And go ahead and say you weren't addressing me, even though you specifically said my name. I have no problem with her identifying as white, it's her choice. I used a metaphor, smarty pants. She hates black people, denies THEM(not that she isn't half), thinks lowly of them, as they are lesser beings. But she even said that when she looks in the mirror, she sees black. The very thing she hates. So it's not that since she's darker that she can only be black, cause I never said that. It's that she hates it in her and how it affects her outward appearance and would rather it not be there. Don't blame me for your misinterpretation. Most people are somewhat biased, in some sort of way. I didn't condemn her for liking her white side more, just made comments about her hating her black side. So why the big deal if I seem to like my black side more, when I don't even hate my other half? Like I said, I like being me, without either of the halves, I'd be someone else. She wishes the black wasn't there, and that she was all white. Lastly, I was never receiving anything about sex, if I did, I would've simply reported it. I wasn't trying to insult you, because either way,I make my insults very bold. But just stating the very obvious -that of course I receive more attention and interest than you and that you would not understand the volume of unneeded validation and interest I receive from guys of all ages, colors, and levels of attractiveness. But I didn't sign up for people to send me crazy long notes about being my soulmate, or telling me how they would give me whatever I want and how we were meant to be. I doubt, better yet, I KNOW you haven't gotten half as much of the interest that I did. Therefore, you wouldn't understand. Okay so anyway, what I can get of this is a misunderstanding. Cause this wouldn't have gotten as far if you hadn't attacked me, when all I said was that you make way to big out of a deal of it and agree with some things said, and that she hates what she sees(she said she saw black, not me) Did I say she was not mixed? No. Like I said, don't blame me for your misinterpretation.
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homesteader says:Posted: 25 Dec 08
P.S. I do not watch television , people are paid to show foolishness on those shows . And I do not like 8 commercials every ten minutes so I shut the satelitte off years ago , DVD or VCR movies only for me hehe . Love Les
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homesteader says:Posted: 25 Dec 08
I was taught , sticks n' stones will break your bones , but names with never hurt you . I drove cross-country truck for years and never met anyone that , I did not show respect for . Enjoy the days one at a time . Life is far too short to hate . Love Les
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Salsassin says:Posted: 25 Dec 08
"who claimed not identifying as black was wrong?" Ah, you are so asinine you think all posts just deal with you. "The problem is, no one wants to be black or identified as being black For example “Hispanic” you have black hispanics like Panamain,Honduras, Dominicans etc these cultures would cut off there right hand to say that they are black." "Dominicans are always trying to identify themselves with anything other than black. I do have a few relatives that don’t see themselves as black but trust me they are." "Why did Tyra bring that first ugly self-hating Black girl on the show." I addressed those claims "I continue to argue with you cause you accused me of that when I did no such thing, and not only did you do that but you try to make it seem as if I had no choice and that I think others shouldn’t." Yep, no reading comprehension. I told you you had a choice, but that African American choice was influenced by what its cultural parameters for Black are. Jim Crow created a much larger community that identifies as Black as it fused in mixed groups as well. So your choice is still affected by what you see growing up. And again, it is not just you the individual, it is about general trends. "I’ve been repeatedly stating how this is about hate and denial, a few people have also brought up that point. But you keep bringing up self identity. And you say I’m holier thou even though I pointed out awhile ago that I have my own faults and that others do too and that I wouldn’t judge anyone’s self identity." Keep trying. I already stated I did not agree with self-hate and denial, but I clearly stated that all people that do not identify as Black are not self hating or in denial. But you keep arguing with me so you obviously have issues with that even if you claim otherwise. "I don’t claim my other half, more than likely never will because I don’t relate to it so I don’t identify, but it’s there and I don’t deny it. In response to you I’ve said something that would offend some members of my family, simply out of frustration. So, I will clarify that I love all people regardless of ethnicity or color. I’ve already stated my point about the white baby thing cause that was not self hate. I just wanted a caramel baby like me but as I mentioned earlier, that was a little phase because if I were to have a baby, I’d want it to look like it was mine.. which I even stated was not the right way to think." Nice amendment. I still think that mentality is latent in you. Didn't see you say that you wouldn't marry someone darker than you because the kid would come out to dark. SO it still is about you disliking one specific side more. "Anywho, I Love both parts of me cause they make me, me." LOL. I'd love to see you take an unconscious bias test. But I doubt you ever will. "I just don’t like you and your bs. Because since the very beginning, I’ve been talking about hate & denial and you always attacked and countered with stuff about self identity. Bt, somehow, you can’t see your fault in that." More cluelessness. It was you who jumped in and accused me of comments when I was addressing other posters. So spare me, the claim that I just addressed self identity in a void. And don't BS about what you said. "The women speaking of Black Dominicans are right, don’t care what that other guy says." You agreed with their comments. "anywho, I know the perspectives I know from plenty of ACTUAL Dominicans, born and raised there, white brown and black ones." You ignored the fact that I posted an actual quote from a Dominican living in the island. "It’s all comparative to that facially challenged Black girl, obviously black but doesn’t like it and would rather deny it. even though it stares her in the face everyday she looks in the mirror." And you made the claim that because the biracial girl was darker she could only be Black and was in denial. So cut the crap that you support choice. "I’m gonna mention that you tried to get on my level; and stooped far below me, I’m looking very far down on you. *tisk*tisk* how old are you sir? I was taught to have respect for my elders, and normally always do. but since this started, I’ve had none for you." You are an adult when you are 18. Period. You stooped into idiocy, and continue to do so. I will show that idiocy. "I will be the adult and end this. because now that I’ve proven my point, and shown your fault in this, I have no reason to argue or toy with you." LOL, this whole thread shows you have yet to behave or think like an adult or more importantly, like a rational being. "Vous avez plein de merde. good day sir." Merde, c'est ce que vous avez à l'intérieur du cerveau. "oh, one more thing. I deleted my other page because I was being flooded by guys I had no interest in(having that much interest from the opposite sex is another thing I doubt you could relate to….pardon my french). My profile now is only for blogs and chat." And I should care why you changed your profile why? Still doesn't change what you posted with that other profile. On your side note, People contacting me every day seem to differ from your foolish opinion. But I guess your profile only attracted guys interested in sex. Sorry to hear that. If you weren't so asinine in the content of your posts, the clearly wasted intelligence that is there would shine through more. You are a smart kid, but you seriously need to work on your reading comprehension, your memory retention of what you wrote, and your maturity. I have no problem going down to the gutter when someone is throwing mud. The difference is that my posts tend to be above that, respectful, on average. I am still waiting to see you take one step out of the gutter once.
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lala_ says:Posted: 25 Dec 08
oh, one more thing. I deleted my other page because I was being flooded by guys I had no interest in(having that much interest from the opposite sex is another thing I doubt you could relate to....pardon my french). My profile now is only for blogs and chat.
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lala_ says:Posted: 25 Dec 08
“I contradicted those who claimed any who chose to not identify as Black where wrong. ” who claimed not identifying as black was wrong? I continue to argue with you cause you accused me of that when I did no such thing, and not only did you do that but you try to make it seem as if I had no choice and that I think others shouldn’t. I’ve been repeatedly stating how this is about hate and denial, a few people have also brought up that point. But you keep bringing up self identity. And you say I’m holier thou even though I pointed out awhile ago that I have my own faults and that others do too and that I wouldn’t judge anyone’s self identity. I don’t claim my other half, more than likely never will because I don’t relate to it so I don’t identify, but it’s there and I don’t deny it. In response to you I’ve said something that would offend some members of my family, simply out of frustration. So, I will clarify that I love all people regardless of ethnicity or color. I’ve already stated my point about the white baby thing cause that was not self hate. I just wanted a caramel baby like me but as I mentioned earlier, that was a little phase because if I were to have a baby, I’d want it to look like it was mine.. which I even stated was not the right way to think. Anywho, I Love both parts of me cause they make me, me. I just don’t like you and your bs. Because since the very beginning, I’ve been talking about hate & denial and you always attacked and countered with stuff about self identity. Bt, somehow, you can’t see your fault in that. I’m gonna mention that you tried to get on my level; and stooped far below me, I’m looking very far down on you. *tisk*tisk* how old are you sir? I was taught to have respect for my elders, and normally always do. but since this started, I’ve had none for you. I will be the adult and end this. because now that I’ve proven my point, and shown your fault in this, I have no reason to argue or toy with you. Vous avez plein de merde. good day sir.
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Salsassin says:Posted: 25 Dec 08
Aww, lala is having an identity issue since she removed one profile and started another. So sad. Teenage stupidity showing again then? Or is it just you? One. Never argued against personal choice. If you didn't have a problem with that you are arguing a moot point. Jim Crow was an enforced cultural practice. Never said Jim Crow existed today. But the cultural group that was formed by it does exist to this day. And you are a part of it. Never claimed I supported a Half Black girl hating on her Black side. I contradicted those who claimed any who chose to not identify as Black where wrong. So I could care less if you claim to be for choice. The fact that you are still arguing with me invalidates your claim. Now, go suck on a candy or something.
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Salsassin says:Posted: 25 Dec 08
Let’s analyze lala’s cluelessness Comment by Salsassin on 16 December 2008: One group’s perception of what is “White”, “Black”, “Asian”, “Mixed” whatever might not be anothers. In one culture you might be seen as Black, in another you wouldn’t. The Masses vary by region Ultimately, the dichotomy of Black and White introduced in Jim Crow (believe it or not, one droppism and what not was not a part of slavery) has caused a lot of these antagonisms. Forcing people to pick sides. Comment by Salsassin on 17 December 2008: Many Afrodescent people do not like the label Black. So why should Afro-latinas of Panamanian, Dominican, or whatever have to identify as Black just because you choose to do so? Some do, some don’t. That is their choice`. There is nothing wrong with the Black identity, but it is not for everyone, nor is it some type of biological reality they are denying. If they denied they had African ancestry, that would be different. Different perceptions in different cultures. Then stupid lala says: Comment by lala2qz on 19 December 2008: The women speaking of Black Dominicans are right, It’s all comparative to that facially challenged Black girl, obviously black but doesn’t like it and would rather deny it. even though it stares her in the face everyday she looks in the mirror. Of course there is the assumption that she only looks Black. Comment by Salsassin on 19 December 2008: This girl is Half Black, Half White. She is just as much White, as she is Black. If Obama can identify as Black, she can identify as White. WHat stares at her in the face is a mixed faceWhat part of self identity don’t you get? Because Jim Crow imposed one droppism on you, you think all people identify as you do. Comment by grrr.... on 23 December 2008: his ignorance towards american ones show when he uses Jim Crow and the one drop rule as the only reason mixed people have pride in their black heritage. huh? and he says african american too? plenty of black people dont even use or like that. why cant they just be black AMERICANS? She totally missed: Comment by Salsassin on 16 December 2008: One group’s perception of what is “White”, “Black”, “Asian”, “Mixed” whatever might not be anothers Comment by Salsassin on 17 December 2008: Many Afrodescent people do not like the label Black. So why should Afro-latinas of Panamanian, Dominican, or whatever have to identify as Black just because you choose to do so? Some do, some don’t. That is their choice`. There is nothing wrong with the Black identity, but it is not for everyone, nor is it some type of biological reality they are denying. Comment by Salsassin on 23 December 2008: Get a clue. I never said Jim Crow is the only reasn. But it is a major factor in creating the African American community as it is today. Feel free to show me any other community in the Americas that one drops. Only the Caribbean ones that are predominantly African. No where else in the Americas would someone like Alicia Keys only be seen as Black. They wouldn’t deny her mix, but they would not only focus on one identity. It would be her choice to choose which group she identifies with. omment by grrr... on 24 December 2008: First, I dont care what anyone identifies with, where have I written that since I’m half black and I identify as black, that others should too? ummmm… NOWHERE! Then why are you arguing with me? How can you tell ME that Jim Crow is why I LOVE identifying as black? You are so ignorant, if you were half black, maybe your words would mean something. BUT YOU’RE NOT, I AM. There is NO one drop rule where I’m from. It has NEVER affected me. You’re so dumb. In your eyes, it’s not possible for me to identify as black on my own, “OMG must be some other reason, must be Jim Crow.” NOT!! hush hush white guy, you’re the one imposing things on people, Jim Crow has nothing to do with me. Of course she has no clue about cultural perception and how it influences by generation. Comment by lala on 24 December 2008: I am MIXED. wth are you talking about? Show me where I said something about claiming? I SPECIFICALLY said denial. My parents didn’t influence anything, I was raised by my grandmother and she NEVER influenced my choice. Are you half black? NO. so stop trying to act like you would know. You can research ACTUAL half black people like myself all you want, it doesn’t make you know where I come from. Nice try. You claim mixed but identify as Black and talk bad about a person who recognizes she is mixed but identifies as White. And yes, your family influence is there. Based on who looked like you and identified as Black. Keep shwng your stupidity. After all, I said it was about choice from the get go. You decided to chime in. All I stated was that Jim Crow was a cultural influence. Get over it.
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rubena says:Posted: 25 Dec 08
Lala,thank you for your comments.....Please don't get personal.....None of us on this site were on Tyra's show, we are all beautiful inside and out. Personally, I prefer the inside beauty and I am sure that you do. Merry christmas
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rubena says:Posted: 25 Dec 08
I find the discussions interesting, however, there is no need to for "the writers" to quarrel. In regards to the topic, I believe that people are free to view themselves as they do, and free to express it as such. We really don't know, nor shared their past experiences so we cannot judge them.
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starthai says:Posted: 24 Dec 08
And to add to that, the "Jim Crow" rule is derived from racism. I don't go by that rule, some people call it how they see it either way.
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Red says:Posted: 24 Dec 08
uhh...I think this thread has gotten way off-topic. This is not a discussion about the one drop rule. The gist of the "discussion" is about hating (not ignoring) a certain part of your heritage irrespective of how one identifies.
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Julianna says:Posted: 24 Dec 08
Salsassin (I can't even write that with a straight face!!) - you have a lot of nerver talking about someone's comprehension ability or getting hooked on phonics. Perhaps if you spent a little more time studying for the bar exam than spreading your prophecies online...well, you know where I'm going with this... I'm just sayin'.
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Salsassin says:Posted: 24 Dec 08
Agreed honest. It just irks me when people want choices for themselves but try to shove an identity for others. I was cordial until juliana, lala(and her alterego grrr) and bintin started posting personal attacks. I tend to cop an attitude when people post asinine posts.
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honest says:Posted: 24 Dec 08The level of animosity in this thread is really beyond comprehension. Everyone here is an adult so why not discuss this issue like reasonable adults instead of reverting to ad hominem attacks? According to both the video and the title of the article, the point of this discussion was to address the issue of people who hate one side of their racial makeup. Choosing to ignore one side is not the same as hating it. In either event, people have to find the side of the coin that fits their life and presumably, hate should not be acceptable. Even if the perspectives in the U.S. differ from those of the rest of the world, why should we expect people to immediately adopt a different ideology? When in Rome... Bringing different ideas to the forefront is great because it challenges people's beliefs and hopefully allows them to grow. However, when those ideas are coupled with put downs and disrespectful language how can anyone expect to grow or learn? This is a site that is geared toward people who presumably are at a point in their lives where they are able to free themselves from certain racial restrictions. With that being the case, why is it that this topic is generating so much negativity?
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Salsassin says:Posted: 24 Dec 08
Just look at how people reacted to Tiger Woods when he chose to identify as mixed. And tell me there is no cultural assumptions towards identifying as Black. GTFOH!.
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Salsassin says:Posted: 24 Dec 08
More stupidity as usual. I am half White Half Latino. Your point? And My Dad is tri racial, that included Black. Again your point? I know you didn't read it all because you have no comprehension power. Right to choose. That means you could choose to be black as well. But you are to stupid to notice that. Jim Crow affects you through you parents stupid. You were raised by your parents who influenced your identity. IN other places, people may choose to identify as Black, White or Mixed. in the AA community because of Jim Crow, the group has a lot more people who have a mixed look, so it is easier for someone to accept a Black identity. The Black community in the US has a history of many people doing exactly what you describe. Not fully accepting people who look mixed but getting angry if claiming something else. Now go get hooked on phonics.
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Coaching Testimonial
"My online love inspiration angel"
Submitted by: Patricia, USA, 21
To be honest, in the beginning, I thought it would be a waste of time. But since I've never seen a similar service in any other dating site, I decided to give it a try.
I always "thought" my profile was on point and I did not need any help to correct my page. I always had in my profile if someone is not attracted to my profile, then that's "their" loss.
BOY WAS I WRONG!!
I will never forget my first time using the Coaching Service I was introduced to my personal Dating Coach. Let me put it this way, if it was not for her I would have given up long time ago (even though I'm a new member).
She taught me so many things and gave me good advice, I did not want to stop chatting with her at all.
She opened my eyes to many possibilities when finding love. She is definitely an inspiration and I appreciate a whole lot. She is more than a Dating Coach to me; she is more of a close friend/guide to me. She is definitely my "online love-inspiration angel".
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I am multi racial and personally feel that to deny any part of you regaurdless of whether you identify it or not is trully ignorant. LOL @ Wonka..i give the same answer when asked what am I...and it is true that America seems to be far fixated on race and ethnicity to see any thing else. America as a whole really needs to grow up...if I am ashamed of any thing it is being part of a Un-united States...please let us look at how this country was formed..by all types of races..it is hard to find a pure race any where...so lets just drop titles and be People.